As I settled in last night to watch the (allegedly) drunken debauchery that was the NHL All Star Fantasy Draft (starting in 2011 the league skipped their old East/West and North America/World formats and chose teams via fantasy draft), I took away a few things- for one, it looked like everyone was having fun, and two- why can’t the PGA Tour do something similar?
So armed with that idea, a piece of paper, a pen, and a barely functioning brain, I came up with a plan- the 1st Annual LPGA-PGA Tour All Star Weekend!
Each Tour selects their best 12 players. Players that are nominated but decline are deducted FedEx Cup points/CME Globe points. Players that show up get the equivalent of a top 10 finish in a marquee event and guaranteed status for two years (same as winning an event).
Take one of the spring events. For some reason I keep thinking Dallas would be a great “first option”…some time in April (after the Masters in that nine week period between the Masters and the US Open).
Pick two playing captains…don’t overthink it. Mickelson and Woods? Sure! Think high profile. Have fun with it.
Each team picks 12 players (6 men, 6 women). You know…like, oh, I don’t know…the Solheim, Ryder, and Presidents Cups? Have the “draft” on television. I’m dead certain the Golf Channel would show it. Allow a trade? Hell yes! Encourage drinking? Oh hell yes! Have Feherty or someone similar act as emcee. When they go on stage they get their team bag and shirt (you make up bags for each team…the unused ones get raffled off for The First Tee or Donors Choose (have fans vote among a few selected charities). The last player picked gets a car.
Format? Team format, obviously. Day one (Friday)- everyone plays one round of fourballs (teams are one man/one woman). Day two (Saturday)? everyone plays one round of foursomes (alternate shot). Day three (Sunday)? Match play. Have the women play the odd numbered games, the men the even (so women take slots 1, 3, 5, 7, 9, 11, the men 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12). Tied? Putting contest on the 18th green as to who can make the longest putt. I’d chop down the rough. We’re encouraging birdies and eagles here.
Nobody has to play 36 holes in a day. The winning team gets FedEx/CME Globe points. Shit, I’d let ’em ride carts if they want to. I’d even let it be known quietly that a little on-course wagering won’t offend anyone’s tender mercies. Everyone at this event is wearing a mic.
But what of tradition, you say? Please. You’re telling me that a tournament wouldn’t want this in lieu of a pedestrian 72-hole event? People would buy tickets and quite happily (in fact, my guess is that a lot of places would be happy to host something like this).
It’s still golf. Would you like to see, say, Rickie Fowler and Michelle Wie as teammates for a day or some tournament that nobody cares about?
Besides, isn’t the whole point of this to be entertaining?