Why, hello there. It’s New Year’s Day 2021, and we’re all still here. Nobody’s hung over because we were all responsible and stayed home in small groups rather than going out to large parties (unless you’re rich or an elected official, in which case fill your boots on the taxpayer dime). After an off-season of a few weeks, the 2021 PGA Tour golf season starts next week in Hawaii. The LPGA gets things going a few weeks later in Florida (I know I say this all the time, but seriously- if you only have time to watch one tour, watch the LPGA).
I’m sure that there are those who have made predictions on every event already, and while I admire their commitment, I’m not that writer. I just don’t have the time to keep up, and neither do you in all likelihood. However, I’ve put together some prognostications about the game that I’ve broken down into the following categories: Professional Tours, Media/Publications/Equipment, and Local News.
PRO TOURS
One of the California West Coast events is getting moved/postponed/canceled. The COVID situation in Southern California is beyond dire (they’re out of hospital beds and are turning away patients from hospitals). They had to move the Rose Bowl game to Texas. If you look at the events in La Quinta (Amex), La Jolla (Farmers Insurance) and LA (Genesis), it’s hard to see these events taking place unless there is a massive sea change in cases. For the record, I’m hoping that this doesn’t happen and that the caseloads in California plummet and everything reverts to pre-COVID world.
We will see another fan-less West Coast swing and (unfortunately) a fan-less Masters. This isn’t political. COVID isn’t going to go away because of a new administration. If 35-40% of the population keeps going around thinking that it’s some giant hoax, then nothing is going to change.
The 2022 PGA Championship is getting moved. My out-of-the-box suggestion? Cancel the Genesis in February and move the 2021 PGA from Kiawah to Riviera. Then play the 2022 PGA Championship at Kiawah Island. If the PGA of America thought the 1990 event was unpleasant, playing the 2022 event where its scheduled to be held will be far worse.
A Canadian man and at least one American woman are going to win majors in 2021.
Bryson DeChambeau will win at least one event and will skip an event due to injury.
Two of the men’s major winners will be first-time winners.
Europe will retain the Ryder Cup.
At least one prominent American male player will opt out of participating in the Olympics.
MEDIA/EQUIPMENT/PUBLICATIONS
CBS and NBC will continue the trial balloon of dumping some weekend coverage onto their over-the-top streaming services (CBS All Access and Peacock respectively). There will be complaints and ratings will be flat/down slightly.
Brandel Chamblee will say something outrageous. It will be forgotten within 72 hours.
Golf Channel will be talking about doing another reboot or possibly pushing the majority of its programming to Peacock by the end of 2021.
CBS and NBC will add another 1-2 minutes of commercials to their weekend coverage, angering viewers. All because they overpaid for the PGA Tour rights package (bidding against who I have no idea) for reasons that make zero sense.
Expect the legacy golf magazines to trim another 1-2 issues per year off the print editions. And yet, there will be at least 27 subscription forms in each copy. Their equipment issues will have the kind of conflicts of interest that would never been allowed a decade ago.
Brick and mortar stores that thrive will figure out the secret sauce that makes them a better option than online. This will start with better size options, and better service. My plea to the stores: make the experience of shopping in your stores better than shopping online. Please. If I had a dollar for every time I’ve gone into a pro shop/store with money to spend and walk out because nothing they have in the store is my size, I could easily pay for a round anywhere except Pebble Beach and TPC Sawgrass.
2022 is going to be interesting because several NBC/Comcast rights deals (NHL, Premier League) come up for renewal (the NHL deal comes up after this season). Could this open the floodgates for a consolidation of golf TV rights? I know this seems insane, but if I told you that Fox was going to walk away from its USGA package in 2020, would you have thought I was crazy 12 months ago?
LOCAL NEWS
Rounds played in the DMV will take a slight hit when the cicadas make their once-every-17-years appearance this spring. You’ve been warned. Last time was in 2004 (courses without a lot of trees won’t have any issues). The largest factor in the area will remain the weather. If it’s favorable (we have normal rainfall, spring starts when it’s supposed to and it’s not surface of the sun hot for two months straight), then people will show up. This area is still underserved with respect to public courses.
More of a wish, but Columbia Association will decide that they’ve done enough to screw up golf courses (they’re treading dangerously into Everything They Touch Dies territory) and turn over management of both Hobbits Glen and Fairway Hills to one of the big boys of course management (Troon, Kemper Sports, Billy Casper, ClubCorp, hell at this point might as well enlist Club Pro Guy and his fine superintendent Miguel Vega). If anyone at CA is reading this, you have zero clue how to run a golf course and the people who actually work at your courses know this better than I do. Actually, Columbia Association can’t really run a literal one-car parade. They screwed up their gyms, they tried suing to prevent the annual Festival of Lights at Merriweather, and they’re doing their dead level best to continue to piss people off.
No local courses are going to close in 2021. There was enough of a cull in 2018-2019 (and there definitely was one) and 2020 ended up being pretty good in terms of rounds played (once courses opened). For now, all eyes are on DC as we watch to see what happens with the DC courses being redone by The Links Trust (Tom Doak and Gil Hanse working together) and eventually being managed by Troon.
Expect a hurricane, record rainfall, record heat and several other acts of God from August 23-29. The BMW Championship is at Baltimore’s Caves Valley. You think I’m kidding. Not even a bit. I’m old enough to remember the TUESDAY FINISH in 2006 at the then-FBR Open at what is now TPC Potomac. I really hope I’m wrong on this, but history doesn’t exactly bode well.
I will play when I can, and probably maintain the kind of mediocrity that I’m famous for. But I play fast, so there’s that.
Best wishes for a Happy New Year, and let’s all hope that in 12 months we’re remembering 2021 for the good things.
SONG OF THE DAY
This is more than 35 years old and it’s still good. From the OG’s of Goth:
Well, it’s December 2020 and as I’m writing this, the final round of the US Women’s Open is getting started. Let that sink in for a moment. A Monday finish for a tournament that was originally scheduled for June that was moved to December is a pretty good indicator of what 2020 was like.
I’m not wearing a mask (hey, another hot take) because I’m at home by myself (the dog doesn’t count) but I’ve got masks in my car and one in my golf bag. Another item in the ‘things that became a thing in 2020’ column. So golf was pretty messed up once COVID showed up. They stopped the Players Championship after one round (and a Chainsmokers concert that became a super-spreader event), took a 3-month hiatus, canceled the Open championship, moved the USPGA from May to August, the US Open from June to September, and the Masters from April to November. The Ryder Cup got canceled and rescheduled for 2021. The women moved the ANA Inspiration from early April to September (Palm Springs in late summer…AWESOME) and the US Open from June to December.
Oh, and no fans at tournaments like nearly every other sport in the US. On the one hand, last month’s Masters were devoid of the roars that make it so great. On the other hand, Trevor and Brock weren’t screaming “MASHED POTATOES” every nine minutes after that second Michelob Ultra, so all in all it’s a win.
FOX bailed on the USGA package because they didn’t want to give up a Sunday of NFL games in September, so welcome back NBC, Golf Channel and (sound of me vomiting) Peacock (NBC’s ‘let’s put all the shit you dirt eaters love on a premium streaming site that sucks ass). Overall this is a win for golf fans especially since Shane Bacon has joined Golf Channel (he was the best thing on FOX by a mile). I have to admit I’m looking forward to NBC putting the Super Bowl on Peacock in a couple years just out of sheer spite while NBC shows a dog show. But if there’s one positive to the USGA package reverting back to NBC, it’s that we now get that Yanni song playing eighty bazillion times per day.
Jack Black is REALLY happy about the USGA package going back to NBC
However, despite all of the upheaval, there is one constant. If it’s early December, it means Golf Digest put out another holiday gift guide, presumably because they had little else to do. They also have a ‘for the golfer who has everything‘ version, which makes zero sense because if they had everything they wouldn’t need this sponsored crap. But, we digress. To make this easier on both of us, I’m not including pictures of the products. You’re not buying any of this shit, and neither am I. So let’s get started.
UNDER ARMOUR MEN’S UA STORM EVOLUTION DAYTONA FULL ZIP
Price: $100
They say: This water-repellent jacket is engineered to adapt to changing temperatures to retain heat in the cold and release heat when the body needs to cool off. The bomber jacket design is on-trend and ultra-breathable for a comfortable fit either layered or as a simple shell.
SGIC says: To borrow from a popular saying, I think it’s time we just admit that Everything Under Armour Touches Dies. You have college teams running from their sponsorship deals. They tried and lost out on deals to outfit NHL and MLB teams as the official uniform supplier. Their stock is in the toilet. And they hitched their golf fortunes to Jordan Spieth, which looked genius in 2015 but now looks like a terrible idea. This jacket looks perfect for suburban dads who don’t play golf. Coming to a kids soccer game near you while dad makes sure everyone has gluten-free oranges for halftime.
SONY WH100MXM3 BLUETOOTH HEADPHONES
Price: $280
They say: Home or away, these ultra-powerful headphones are a saving grace. The noise-cancelling technology is designed to adapt to the sound where you are, so the volume will turn up or down depending on the ambient sound sensed by the headphones. A built-in mic allows for hands-free phone calls, and touch functionality allows you to control the music. The headphones’ “quick attention mode” allows you to cover the right ear to turn down the music for a moment for quick interruptions or conversations. The battery life lasts up to 30 hours.
SGIC says: Every year they put at least one pair of overpriced headphones in their guide and I don’t know why. You’re not wearing these on the golf course. I guess they’re great to avoid hearing your kids yell and scream while you enjoy an Adderall smoothie for breakfast. I’ve never seen someone play wearing these things. I know this seems crazy, but you could actually engage your playing partners in friendly banter while playing. Wearing these on a Zoom meeting just makes you look ridiculous. It won’t hurt.
BULLEIT BOURBON YETI OUTDOOR PACK
Price: $72
They say: The pack comes with one 740mL* bottle of Bulleit Bourbon Kentucky Straight Whiskey, one 375 mL bottle of Bulleit 95 Rye Whiskey, and one 10 oz. Bulleit Branded YETI Rambler to regulate the temperature of your drink—either warm or cold.
SGIC says: The bottle of Bulleit is 750ml*, not 740ml and can be found for $25 at most liquor stores. Do the math. You’re getting hosed on this deal. Having said that, Bulleit is actually decent bourbon for the price (if you’re asking, you can include Buffalo Trace as well). I’m not advocating you use an adult sippy cup for day drinking, but if you’re going to day drink, go all in and use the giant size ones. Drink responsibly, kids.
TED BAKER WATPP WATER BOTTLE
Price: $42
They say: This fun, leaf-covered water bottle offers a fun way to stay hydrated throughout the day. The hexagonal top is not only stylish, but it’s easier to open up. If green isn’t your color, the menswear brand has a handful of other color options with the same sophisticated silhouette.
SGIC says: I know that when I’m choosing to survive rather than die from lack of water, it had better be FUN. Because drinking water should be FUN. Which means I’ve been doing it all wrong my entire life! I just drank water because I was thirsty but it was never FUN. Seriously, $42 for a goddamn water bottle? I can buy a dozen PROV1X’s for that right now. Which, if you’re curious, might be a better option for someone who plays golf. And more FUN. Whose mouth is shaped like a hexagon? Mine is oval, so’s yours.
LACOSTE OVAL METAL NOVAK DJOKOVIC COLLECTION SUNGLASSES
Price: $219
They say: While not a golfer, Novak Djokovic’s Capsule Collection will certainly appeal to stylish golfers. The oval shape is flattering to almost any face, while a metal double bridge and acetate rim add a uniquely upscale look and feel. It’s a lightweight pair of shades that can be worn almost anywhere
SGIC says: $200+ for sunglasses that look like they’re from the Joe Biden aviators collection. Best worn for when you want to throw a temper tantrum at the US Open and get defaulted after telling people COVID is fake and then getting it. They look like the sunglasses Guy Who Owns a Boat wears at the yacht club. Ideally matched with a quarter zip sweater worn or tied over his popped collar polo shirt. Get a 10% discount if your name is Todd.
Price: $45 and whatever shroud of dignity you had left.
They say: Get in the holiday spirit with this golf sweatshirt inspired by the ugly Christmas sweater trend. The super-soft cotton crewneck is warm but has a lightweight feel, making it easy to layer with. The festive design paired with the affordable price point make this a worthy gift for the golfer on your list—even if that golfer is you.
SGIC says: To quote Al Czervik, this looks like the kind of sweater that should come with a free bowl of soup (to spill on this abomination), or at the very least some iron covers and maybe a ball retriever. Dark green with FORE written in giant letters on the chest. Gimme two of these (one to shit on, the other to cover it up with). I mean, if you wear this do people think you’re special in the ‘good for you, you cut your meat’ kind of way? And can we please pump the brakes on ugly sweaters? It’s been five-plus years for this fad. Oh, and if you ever see me wearing this monstrosity, you can safely assume I’ve been concussed and/or taken hostage.
TRUE LINKSWEAR SHOE BAG
Price: $45
They say: Even if you’re not a shoe bag kind of golfer, this bag from True Linkswear will come in handy. In addition to a place to put your golf shoes, it has a valuables pouch, tablet sleeve and organized compartments inside the water-resistant zip bag. For organized and disheveled golfers alike, it’s an effective way to keep everything you need tidy and together.
SGIC says: This isn’t terrible. I keep my golf shoes in a cinch sack (the kind with the straps so you can wear it like a backpack) and I’m happy with my cinch sack. But for someone else, this isn’t a bad gift option. Less than $50, and it’s useful. Unlike other options they’ve ‘selected’. Having said that, a tablet sleeve? Really? Who takes their iPad with them when they play?
SONOS MOVE PORTABLE BLUETOOTH SPEAKER
Price: $399
They say: Whether providing the tunes on the course or entertaining at home, this powerful Bluetooth speaker is virtually indestructible—and it sounds great. The shock-resistant case will survive any drops or bumps, and it’s built to survive extreme temperatures and any inclement weather. The charging base is simple to connect to and powers the speaker as it’s in use. It’s a strong gift idea for the golfer who values quality-sounding music—and also needs a portable speaker built with some forgiving qualities.
SGIC says: $400 for a speaker? We’re in a full-blown economic crisis but yeah, the average golfer is throwing down four c-notes on a speaker. You could buy a new disco stick (i.e. driver), or this thing. I bought She Who Is Really In Charge a Bluetooth speaker for $120 a few years ago, and it gets a heavy workout when we’re out on the deck enjoying cocktails with the dog (and it has fantastic sound). Of course, the assholes who buy this are taking it with them on the course, because they’re the exact people who want to share their awful taste in music with everyone else.
ALFRED GIRAUD FRENCH MALT WHISKY HERITAGE BY ALFRED GIRAUD
Price: $155
They say: Give the whisky drinker in your life something new to try with this limited-production French malt. For a personalized touch you can add custom engraving for $40 to make this gift a true memento.
SGIC says: So for $195 you can get the boss a bottle of French whisky that says “eat shit you rotten bastard” on it (but engraved). Or, spend $10 on a small bottle (otherwise known as a Mickey) of Olde Oscelot bourbon with a taped sticky note that says “eat shit” on it. I know where I come down on this. The French make fantastic wine, great champagne and I’d trust their cognac, but not sure about whisky. Just saying. I could give you dozens of better whisky options than this.
TRX SLAM BALL
Price: $45
They say: A slam ball is a simple-yet-dynamic add to any home gym setup. It’s helpful for working on explosive power or mixing up ab routines without requiring too much space. A thoughtful gift for the fitness-minded golfer on your list, or the golfer who needs a less destructive way to relieve tension at the end of the round.
SGIC says: Perfect for when you go full Bryson Dechambeau and commit to his ridiculous eating and training habits. When that first bout of roid rage hits, you can throw this through a wall and then start crying. Lovely. Fact: 90% of people who buy this thing will never actually use it. If you want one, wait another year and start hitting yard sales. Five bucks cash money.
SEAMUS DRIFTWOOD HERRINGBONE POUCHES
Price: $65
They say: Handmade to order, these pouches are great for holding the little things on the course—tees, ball markers, a golf ball or two—but they’re are also an excellent place to store a facemask between wears. The regal green herringbone tweed bag is lined with fleece and pulls closed with leather cut cords. It’s also customizable to add initials, a name or a small icon.
SGIC says: You know what is even better is a Crown Royal bag. It’s the official accessory pouch of SGIC Amalgamated Industries. You can find one of these for around $25-$30, and you have the added bonus of a bottle of good utility whiskey. It even comes in a box for easy gift wrapping. What’s not to love? A tumbler of Crown and Coke is one of my go-to drinking options. No, I’m not an alcoholic because I don’t need to attend meetings. I just drink. A Crown Royal pouch will hold a sleeve of balls and enough tees, divot repair tools, ball-markers and whatever else you use. And it’s purple, which means it’s classy.
$30 for the best accessory bag there is. With a bottle of Crown Royal included.
LULULEMON EVOLUTION LONG SLEEVE POLO
Price: $98
They say: For all the golfers** who discovered and now swear by the , this long sleeve polo is a great next step into the Lululemon golf apparel collection. It’s made with anti-stink technology and sweat-wicking fabric to keep things fresh, has enough stretch for activity without losing its shape and comes in five easy-to-match-with color options.
SGIC says: **does not include anyone who can’t fit into their limited size range so suck rocks if you’re not rail-thin. I have a raft of issues with this gong show of a company. Least of which, they don’t know shit about golf and how golf clothing can and should function. Their photo shoots that purport to be people playing golf are hilariously bad. This shirt doesn’t appear to be able to be tucked in, and the sleeves look terrible. Again- does anyone at this goat rodeo company actually play golf?
MUGGO TEMPERATURE CONTROL MUG
Price: $128
They say: Set the exact temperature you want for your coffee in 10 minutes with this smart mug. A rechargeable battery pops into the bottom of the leak-resistant travel mug, so your coffee will never get too cold on the course or on the go.
SGIC says: If I can’t drink my coffee at 125.43 degrees Fahrenheit then someone’s hearing about it. The people at 7-11 and Royal Farms better be reading this. Last time at Royal Farms my coffee was over 130 degrees. I WANNA SPEAK TO THE MANAGER. Maybe if you actually…oh, I don’t know…DRANK YOUR COFFEE this wouldn’t be an issue. Save $100 and buy a Yeti tumbler. It maintains the temperature pretty well. I use one (they don’t pay me, I bought mine like everyone else).
FOOTJOY X SMATHERS & BRANSON NEEDLEPOINT BELT
Price: $175
They say: This hand-stitched needlepoint belt is vintage, luxe and a great gift for golfers who appreciate a fine attention to detail. Available in green, blue or gray, the belt is finished with a solid brass buckle and Italian leather lining.
SGIC says: When Judge Smails invites you to drop by the yacht club, this is the belt you need. It’s the belt Spalding uses to tie off his arm to shoot heroin, so you know that’s quality. It says “trust fund kid” in the most obnoxious way. Perfect for summer soirees at your dad’s place in the Hamptons while listening to Yacht Rock ironically. Seriously, $175 for a goddamn belt? That, or showing up with not one but TWO bottles of Kim Crawford rose. Their commercials are laughable. They sell what others call ‘cougar juice’ that no serious wine drinker would be caught dead anywhere near them. Walking out of your local bodega in yoga pants holding up a bottle of this swill like you discovered oxygen is hilarious.
NIKE DRI-FIT UV WOMENS GOLF TOP
Price: $40
They say: An ultra-versatile basic, this Nike women’s top has all the performance elements she needs for golf—moisture management, UVA sun protection and a stretch fabric—with a soft cotton feel and relaxed fit that’ll go with everything.
SGIC says: I’m not sure how or why, but when did women’s golf shirts become collar-less? Otherwise, this is not bad. Decent price point, not gaudy. Most of the women I know who play (most of whom can beat your ass any day they feel like it so don’t act like you’re better than them- you’re not) prefer collared shirts, but other than that I can’t really make fun of it. It’s almost reasonable.
JONES CLASSIC STAND BAG
Price: $190
They say: You can’t go wrong with a classic stand bag like this one from Jones Sports Co. The single strap golf bag is made with a durable nylon material, has eight pockets and weighs just five pounds. The deep green colorway is a refreshing change from the traditional black and gray golf bags we see all too often.
SGIC says: You can buy better, lighter and cheaper. Sun Mountain and Ping make fantastic bags and have a double strap for easy carrying if you’re not ready to join the Push Cart Mafia. Hell, even my old Titleist carry bag is lighter than that and it’s 8 years old. Five pounds really isn’t bragging. It looks like the generic golf bag they use in print ads when they don’t want to have to edit out a manufacturer’s name.
LINKSOUL GAITER GIFT BOX
Price: $65
They say: A cozy way to stay warm and add a little protection this season, these LinkSoul gaiters are made from the same ultra-soft material the brand uses to make its popular cloud T-shirts. While gaiters are not recommended by the CDC as a facemask, it’s great to wear over an approved mask or provide coverage if you’re in a pinch.
SGIC says: Gaiters in a gift box are a nice ‘2020 in a box’ option even if they don’t offer much in terms of protection. They’re not bad when it’s cooler, however.
JAMESON COLD BREW WITH HOLIDAY SIPS BOX
Price: $67
They say: This Jameson Cold Brew gift set is the perfect antidote to everything 2020 has thrown our way. Tasty on the rocks or in a cocktail this Irish Whiskey is infused with coffee flavors that might change your coffee order for good. It also comes with candies inspired by classic holiday cocktails to add a sweet-yet-boozy touch to gift giving this year.
SGIC says: I’m going to run for President in 2024 solely on an agenda of eliminating this kind of shit. A bottle of Jameson is $25 and not for anything, but it’s great utility Irish whiskey (I say this from experience; most utility whiskeys like Jameson, Crown Royal, Johnnie Walker Black Label and Dewar’s White Label are fine options). I don’t need or want coffee messing up my Jameson. Best way to drink Jameson? Pour some in a glass. Add a few ice cubes. Maybe a lime/lemon wedge. That’s it. If I see a place offering a Jameson Chocolate Martini I will show up with a flame thrower. Stop it. Quit trying to put things in whiskey. We figured whiskey out centuries ago. Basically, this is overpriced whiskey for people who don’t like whiskey. So you’re paying $40 for mediocre coffee. Buy a box of ProV1’s and a bottle of Jameson for what this runs.
PUMA POP TOP MINI BLUETOOTH SPEAKER
Price: $40
They say: The extremely affordable price point of this speaker ($40) makes it an easy last minute gift for golfers this holiday season. Available in black or white, the mini golf speaker attaches to a golf bag and delivers quality sound. It’s also got a built-in ball marker and bottle opener to make sure you have everything you need to have a good time on the course.
SGIC says: Perfect for saying to the people in your group “I don’t care about pace of play; I’m out here to take forever to play while listening to John Tesh or Creed” which is really something. At least it’s not overpriced.
CORKCICLE COOLER BAG:
Price: $130
They say: Store 12 cans in this padded cooler backpack to make sure you never run out of drinks. The synthetic leather bag is a stylish-yet-subtle way to BYOB comfortably.
SGIC says: For $130 it should come with someone carrying it around. Great, now BIG COOLER is trying to gouge people along with seemingly every other industry. If you’re a Costco member they sell a really nice cooler bag for $10 and it has a shoulder strap. It’s not synthetic leather, but put the $120 in your pocket and call it a win. For $120 you can fill that bad boy with some locally-made beer. Winning!
NIKE REPEL MENS SYNTHETIC FILL GOLF JACKET
Price: $160
They say: or those chilly-but-not-freezing rounds, this insulated shirt-jacket should do the trick. It’s a water-repellent jacket that’s lightweight and breathable with insulated material that stays warm even when wet. The versatile collar creates a business-casual look when folded down or can provide additional warmth when turned up and secured with the button closure.
SGIC says: It looks like a puffer vest and the 1977 vinyl jacket got married and spawned in the back of a 1975 AMC Pacer. This was the byproduct. It’s brown. Who exactly thought we needed to see this thing in shit brown? It’s ugly. If it had the Members Only shoulder epaulets it would at least have the cheesy thing going. It doesn’t, so you’re paying $160 for a butt-ugly jacket. One-way plane ticket to North Korea not included.
TOMMY JOHN COOL COTTON BOXER BRIEF
Price: $36
They say: These briefs featuring a snowman playing golf were too fun not to mention. The whimsical pattern is festive without going overboard, and the cool cotton fabric is ultra comfortable. It’s a go-to pair of briefs with a stay-put waistband that guys will appreciate.
SGIC says: We’ve had 300,000 people die of COVID, but hey- my underpants are fun (but not ‘too’ fun) so we’re all good! I’ve been wearing underpants most of my life, and I’ve never had an issue with waistband technology. I put them on and generally, they tend to stay on all by themselves. I achieve this by purchasing the right size, but that’s just me. But for $36 I’m glad they stay put. Can we talk about their commercials? In what universe to people just parade around the house in their underpants and nothing else? Is there some kind of secret society that gets together and just hangs around in their underpants like it’s not a big deal?
BRAZYN MORPH ALPHA FOAM ROLLER
Price: $70
They say: Foam rollers are an excellent tool for golfers to warm up or cool down muscles, but they tend to be a little too bulky to carry around. Brazyn aims to make foam rollers a little more portable with this collapsible tool. Fully expanded, the roller is 5.5 inches in diameter but will collapse flat to about two inches thick.
SGIC says: Finally, we’ve figured out foam roller technology. Let me wipe that giant collection of flop sweat off my forehead and dance around in my underpants as we celebrate this monumental achievement. I’ve never seen someone at a golf course use a foam roller, and I’ve seen some incredibly weird shit. Is this one of those private club things, like the blue water that’s used to clean combs and stuff in the men’s locker room? If you’re using a foam roller at home, is this ‘really’ a problem that you’d need a $70 foam roller?
JACK BLACK MR FRESH SET
Price: $40
They say: Whether the clubhouse is closed or you just need to freshen up on the go, this set from Jack Black is ultra-useful to have on hand. The All-Over Spray and Wipes will leave you feeling clean and hydrated without a shower. And when you finally find one, the All-Over wash can be used on the hair, face or body to provide deep clean without stripping essential moisture.
SGIC says: $40 for goddamn wipes and some body wash. Does the body wash come in a ramekin? Can I get this personalized as a gift for another $20? If you REALLY cared, wouldn’t you just jump in the pond like Carl Spackler and wash up? Natural spring would be good for you, Carl. Doesn’t everyone work from home now? Just go home and take a shower like an adult (and take a beer with you). Seriously, I can’t begin to properly extol the virtues of a Shower Beer. It doesn’t have to be some fancy IPA. It actually works best if it’s shitty beer. Open the beer, get the water going, jump in, and drink up. It feels so wrong, but it’s so right. Trust me.
LULULEMON WOMENS ON THE FLY JOGGER
Price: $118
They say: A fan favorite on or off the course, these comfortable joggers are made with breathable, sweat-wicking fabrics, an athletic four-way stretch and an upscale design.
SGIC says: $118 for sweatpants. SWEATPANTS. Not trousers, not slacks, not a pair of dark jeans. SWEATPANTS. Dropping over $115 on pants that say “you’ve given up all hope” should be a warning sign. Never mind that 90% of people who will spend $118 on these will never jog or do yoga. But they’ll watch 10 hours of Netflix in one setting. It’s like Bunny Calvin from ‘The Wire’ correctly describing the brown paper bag; the perfect vessel for hiding your beer so you can drink in public. It’s the Great Compromise.
PALM GOLF CO LAZY PALM BEANIE
Price: $22
They say: This minimalist beanie is cozy and stylish. Available in a ton of colors, the simple Palm logo will remind you of warmer days to come.
SGIC says: They’re toques, not beanies. A beanie should have propellers on it. A toque (or ski hat) is what you wear during the cold weather. For just over 20 bucks this isn’t bad. A toque is a component of playing in the winter months. Get a good one. A toque.
FLECHA AZUL ANEJO
Price: “Starts” at $108
They say: Golf and tequila fans will love this brand co-founded by Abraham Ancer. The Anejo is aged for 18 months in American oak bourbon barrels and has an ultra-smooth finish with hints of maple, caramel and cinnamon.
SGIC says: $108 (and up) for tequila made by a guy with as many PGA Tour wins as I have? And it’s twice as much as Patron (which is really good)? Sign me up. This celebrity-name-brand alcohol racket is really something. It’s one thing when it’s an actual A-list celebrity (see George Clooney and his Casamigos brand tequila), but a guy who’s never won on the PGA Tour is hawking a 3-figure bottle of tequila takes some serious cojones. I mean, if Phil wants to roll out Tequila For Wellness, then have at it. I’m honestly surprised Nicklaus or Norman haven’t done this yet. Not for anything, but if you’re a Costco member, their Silver ‘Kirkland’ tequila is $20 for a huge bottle, and for $20 it’s a fantastic value and good drinking tequila.
BOSS ITALIAN MADE SLIDES
Price: $88
They say: Made in Italy, these sporty slides have a contoured foot bed that will provide relief post-round without sacrificing support. Available in a variety of colors ranging from bright oranges to a luxe black and gold, the Boss logo is a stylish statement-maker to fit any style.
SGIC says: Made in Italy “and” they’re sporty. Not enough footwear is sporty. More things should be described as being sporty. That gaping head wound you just got…sporty! The liver damage…sporty! That snap-hook on 14…sporty! Never mind comfortable (which these won’t be unless you have relatively narrow feet). Never mind adjustable (they’re not). These slides (otherwise known as shower shoes), go great with a $300 Supreme hoodie and those $120 sweatpants. On the other hand, if Dustin Johnson was wearing these does he slip and fall on the stairs before his first round at Augusta a few years back? I think not.
ADIDAS CODE CHAOS 2K AEROREADY POLO SHIRT
Price $65
They say: Non-shoulder seams allow for a roomy swing and the lightweight fabric is partially made with recycled polyester for a sustainable performance top that’s easy to pair with. This shirt also appeared in the newly released PGA TOUR 2K21 video game, but gamer or not, it’s a polo golfers will love.
SGIC says: Comes in navy blue so you can pair with a pair of navy pants and join your Dustin Johnson cosplay group.
TOVOLO GOLF BALL ICE MOLDS
Price: $15
They say: A small-yet-thoughtful gift for your golf friends, these molds make golf-ball-shaped ice that will melt slowly to avoid watering down your drink. It’s a simple tool that will go a long way for those who appreciate savoring a good drink.
SGIC says: Is there any industry that doesn’t try to push its way into the Christmas buying season? Now we’ve got Big Ice coming in hard and fast. Golf-ball shaped ice? This is ROUND. Repeat. Round. It’s a ball of ice. It’s one big giant ball rather than a few cubes, but we can’t have that, because Big Ice has to get a taste of the action.
ECCO MENS STREET RETRO GOLF SHOES
Price $150
They say: These leather street-shoe-inspired golf shoes are more than just a stylish accessory. The ECCO Hydromax treatment is water-repellent, the high-tech grip system covers 800 traction angles, and the textile collar adds cushioning for all-day comfort.
SGIC says: Please, for the love of everything good, can someone please tell ECCO to start making their shoes in widths? Seriously. They make some of the best shoes you can buy…if you have an average width foot. I don’t, so as much as I’d like to buy ECCO, I can’t. I mean, I could spend a bunch of money to keep Big Ice and Big Sweatpant flushed with money, but when it comes to buying golf shoes I have 2-3 options at best.
B.DRADDY KYLE PULLOVER
Price: $160
They say: This pullover can be dressed up or down easy, and it’s made with Peruvian Pima Cotton, so the soft feel might be akin to your favorite sweatshirt. The four-button placket has horn buttons for a sophisticated finish to the on-trend striped top.
SGIC says: Of course it’s named after Kyle. Peruvian cotton, bitches! None of that inferior cotton! Somewhere, there’s a guy named Kyle Draddy who hasn’t worked a day in his life and never will courtesy of his trust fund. Kyle has opinions about things. Kyle is wearing this pullover, and having mastered pulling it over his head, he decrees that he is, in fact, the smartest Kyle in the history of Kyles. Kyle belongs to daddy’s private club somewhere in the Hamptons and has been 86’d from over a dozen bars. I think if you wear this sweater, you automatically are required to change your name to Kyle. Or Todd.
HOLIDAY SONG
This remains the gold standard. I refuse to acknowledge that someone has covered this. Enjoy your holidays.
Ko’olau Golf Course. Not a bad place to be right now.
It’s June, which means that (hopefully) golf courses are open and operating where you live, summer is upon us (if you’re playing you should have bug spray AND sunscreen in your bag and they should be getting use- more on that later), and it also means that Father’s Day is soon upon us (it’s June 21st, which “should” have been the day of the final round of the US Open at Winged Foot).
However, that doesn’t mean you can’t spend money you don’t have on dad (confession: to the best of my knowledge I do not have any children…and while I love Linus he’s not shopping online for me…at least I hope so) this year to thank him and to celebrate his love of golf (if your father/grandfather doesn’t play that’s okay too). (Un)fortunately, the people at Golf Digest have put together a “gift guide” for Father’s Day.
I’ll show you a few things and offer my own cheaper/better options on things any golfer that has kids would love. These items haven’t been curated nor are they bespoke. They’re nice ways to say Happy Fathers Day without going deep into debt. Onward.
Seamus Sofa King Pure Set
Price: $64 (all prices in US dollars unless noted).
They Say: Seamus Golf stepped up in March to make masks for those in need. Initially shipping to frontline workers before opening up sales to the general public, the golf company has shipped over 15,000 masks. Masks can be purchased alone or in this set that includes a stainless steel ball marker and hand sanitizer locally distilled near Seamus HQ in Oregon.
SGIC says: $64 for a mask, hand sanitizer and a ball marker. Read that back. Are you shitting me? Oh, but it’s locally distilled hand sanitizer! GTFO. Hand sanitizer should cost a buck or two except that Big Sanitizer is now taking over. You’re not using it to make a martini or a sidecar.
Smith & Sinclair Whiskey Club Alcoholic Gummies
Price: $25.
They say: Move over CBD gummies, whiskey gummies are here to make a splash. The package includes ten gummies of assorted cocktail flavors including old fashioned, whiskey ginger, Manhattan and whiskey sour. And with 5 percent ABV per gummy, these alcoholic candies really pack a punch.
SGIC says: Nothing says America 2020 like this product. It’s whiskey for people who don’t like whiskey, dumbed down to a kids’ candy. Day drink for the love of everything good! With actual whiskey! Pour two (or three, or four) fingers in a glass. Add an ice cube if you’re inclined. Drink. Repeat. By the way, 5% ABV is beer.
Bonobos Fore Father Bundle
Price: $87 for the shorts and the shirt.
They say: Bonobos is running a Father’s Day promotion so you can set dad up with a full golf outfit, without breaking the bank. Use the code thanksdad and get 40-percent-off two items at checkout. Pair a bold golf shirt—like this turquoise floral —with a simple navy short—like the upscale —for a stylish and summery look dad’ll sure to get a few compliments on.
SGIC says: Perfect for your Duffy Waldorf cosplay fantasies or sticking it to Lumberg during Hawaiian Shirt Day. Oh never mind-we all work at home now so just wear sweatpants or a god damn onesie and show everyone you’ve given up. The shorts aren’t bad.
G/FORE Skull & T’s Embossed Full Zip
Price: $165
They say: This midlayer is made with a technical jersey fabric and has an extra soft interior to add a bit of warmth on cooler mornings. The subtle skull pattern is on-trend, without the risk of clashing with the rest of his outfit and the mock neckline adds a touch of refinement to dress up any look.
SGIC says: If someone wearing this rolled up as your fourth it’s a guarantee that they will claim to be an 8 handicap, play like a 22, and trot out every excuse imaginable (one of which will involve “I need to consult with my mental game coach”…okay, I have one of those- his name is Johnnie Walker), and will take 3 minutes to miss a 9- footer for a triple bogey. They will have a staff bag and likely have spent more time thinking of what they were going to wear than they ever have on practicing.
They say: These luxury headphones have upscale styling with all the high-tech features dad could need. Proximity sensors automatically pause or play audio when the headphones are taken on or off, have active noise cancelling built in and can be connected to a smartwatch.
SGIC says: Steely Dan and Nickelback never sounded so good. Rock out to some Hootie and the Blowfish while the world collapses on itself. Go ahead, go further in debt to spend $600 on headphones. Dad will enjoy yacht rock in these.
Public Rec All Day Every Day Jogger
Price $98. Not a typo.
They say: Dad will love these cozy joggers that are golf-appropriate. The elastic waistband has an internal drawstring to maximize comfort, while maintaining a refined look. Made with a moisture-wicking, breathable fabric, the versatile pant is a blend of stretchy spandex and durable nylon that’ll transition easily from the course to dinner.
SGIC says: They’re fucking sweatpants that cost $100. Big Sweatpant (and his young lovely friend Big Yoga Pant) are taking over. And of COURSE you’re going to wear sweatpants to a restaurant because screw it…just give up. Quit trying. No sense putting forth an effort for anything. Is wearing pants or shorts with a belt that hard? Still waiting to see a golf-themed Snuggie.
GLCO X Malbon Bucket Golf Hat
Price: $40 and a possible restraining order.
They say: Part of the exclusive Garrett Leight and Malbon Golf collection, this reversible bucket channels beachy vibes.
SGIC says: You should get one of these for free if you buy a FREE CANDY or FREE PUPPIES van to go along with the likely impending criminal charges. Wear this to the beach and you might as well just get a “PERV HERE” sandwich board to wear. The official hat for people who own metal detectors and use them at the beach. Wear this with that Hawaiian print shirt and blind people.
Puma Bomber Jacket
Price: $160.
They say: A stylish on- and off-course jacket with a retro feel. It’s a great layering piece, especially for dads who need to add a little character to their golf looks. The knit sweater sleeves are cozy and perfect for cool summer twilight rounds.
SGIC says: Perfect for when you want people to think you appeared in season 1 of The Sopranos. Should be part of The Paulie Walnuts collection. Wear this to Starbucks and order an espresso and ask for some locally sourced gabbagool.
Lord Jones Old Fashioned CBD Gum Drops
Price: $45.
They say: Each candy has 20 milligrams of CBD—a calming, non-psychoactive hemp extract that can provide relief from pain and anxiety. Plus, they come in fruity flavors.
SGIC says: At six dollars per gummy I should be getting baked on them and not have to worry about getting diabetes. Just buy some actual weed. It’s legal in most jurisdictions. Or buy a CBD supplement (the one I take has 20mg of CBD and I don’t have to worry about Wilfred Brimley showing up to lecture me about DIABEETUS).
Good, Good? Needlepoint Headcover
Price: $115 for a mallet-sized cover.
They say: For those more generous than most on the greens, protect your flatstick with this unique needlepoint headcover from the new Golf Digest SELECT collection. Hand-crafted by Needle Golf, this putter cover is available for blades and mallets. Available at select.golfdigest.com
SGIC says: For $115 you could could add a few bucks and get him an actual new putter. Just saying. Why promote a mediocre golf magazine? In a couple years when these things don’t sell they’ll give ’em away with subscriptions.
Vineyard Vines Pescadero Houndstooth Performance 1/2 Zip
Price: $145
They say: In collaboration with Jim Nantz, this Vineyard Vines half zip will add a touch of sophistication to any outfit. The houndstooth pattern is refined and stylish, while the soft performance blend material has a ton of stretch for a comfortable wear.
SGIC says: Was there really some underserved segment of the population who wanted to spend $145 on something from the Jim Nantz collection? Clearly, yes. I want to buy a CBS blazer but ONLY if you include a flag pin AND a pocket square from the Jim Nantz collection. Burnt toast and “Sir Nick Faldo” never sounded so yummy. Perfect for doing sponsor interviews in. Buy this, and your new safe word is “Hello Friends”.
MOVING ON
Let’s say that you don’t weekend in the Hamptons, daddy doesn’t run a hedge fund and you don’t have a 7-figure trust fund. You actually work during the week but you’d like to do something nice for dad that’s golf related. Here’s a few ideas that won’t break the bank:
A dozen of his preferred brand of balls. Sneak a peek in his golf bag to see what he plays. Cost? $30-$50.
Buy him a round of golf at an upscale daily fee course. You’re talking $90-$250 depending on where but it’s a nice treat for him.
Tickets to a PGA/LPGA Tour event in your area (if they’re allowing fans). Seeing an event live really lets you see just how good the pros are, and most of them are actually really nice people and it’s a nice “all day” getaway. Cost: $25-$100. He can buy himself a tournament shirt and have a great time.
If he’s walking but carrying his bag, a push cart is a FANTASTIC option. They run $75-$250 but they fold up easily and he’ll still be able to walk but not have to carry so it will be easier on his back. Ogio, Sun Mountain and Clicgear make great products.
If you’re really tight with money (and that’s okay), get him some sunscreen and bug spray. Trader Joe’s sells a spray-on sunscreen that’s sweatproof for $6.00 (I use it and it’s great; cheaper than other brands and easier to wash off). Off! makes a bug spray that goes on easy (aerosol can) that doesn’t reek and does a good job of keeping bugs away; it retails for $6-$9 depending on where you shop. So for $15.00 you can hook dad up with a couple things he should be using (seriously- he needs to be using sunscreen and bug spray).
SONG OF THE DAY
Since I’m not going to be able to see New Order in concert (their tour dates all canceled due to COVID-19), enjoy one of their best known songs. An actual music video, directed by Johnathan Demme (yes, that one).
2020 Foot Joy Pro SL (Spikeless) fresh out of the box
***Please note that I was not compensated in any way by Footjoy nor did they contact me to write this. I bought the shoes through a well-known online specialty golf retailer. This review is entirely my opinion.
After 3 years and more rounds than I can count (somewhere between 65-75), my existing ProSL’s were starting to wear out so I figured it was time to replace them. As I have pointed out in other posts, I’m a fairly big lad and I’m aware that this means shoes break down quicker and it means they don’t last as long as would be ideal. Because their sizing hasn’t changed I knew what size I would need.
One tip: Unless you know your size by brand/model, I strongly recommend trying shoes on in-store BEFORE you buy. Ideally, at the end of the way, wearing socks that you’d wear when playing. Shoes aren’t cheap so you want to make sure that you’re not wasting money.
Since I really liked my old pair and had good luck with them, when it came time to buy a new pair I was always likely to stick with Foot Joy. For one, their last fits my foot very well. I learned the hard way that every company makes a slightly different last, plus I tend to under-pronate which makes things even more difficult. The Foot Joy shoes don’t make this worse which is more than I can say when it comes to a couple of other brands.
Other brands, you ask? Adidas has made some changes and their current range really doesn’t fit. Plus, they don’t make an extra-wide and they’ve narrowed their existing wide a bit. Nike shoes have never felt good on my feet (I bought a pair of their golf shoes in the 90’s when they were just starting to get into the market; they never felt great and broke down very quickly). I tried New Balance once but wasn’t impressed. Made my foot sweat something terrible and waterproofing was bad (I play a lot of early morning rounds so my feet were often wet after a few holes). I wear ASICS sneakers as they fit my foot fairly well; haven’t tried their golf range yet (been hard to find).
Comfort: Excellent. Most modern shoes “should” fit well right out of the box with synthetic materials. Not like a shoe from 30 years ago that you’d have to break in. These fit great the second I put them on. They make a BOA model for $20 extra, but I prefer the regular lace-up. The foam is highly dense but still provides plenty of cushion. It’s not as spongy as some other models, but for me, it was very good. One note: Foot Joy tends to run a half to one full size smaller than my regular shoes. I wear a 10 1/2 in ASICS, New Balance and Mizuno but I wear a 10 in Foot Joy.
Removable sockliner is a great added feature if you wear inserts or orthotics. Plenty of cushion but not overly spongy.
Grip: Excellent. This was a bit of a revelation for me. I always thought (wrongly) that spikeless shoes would have bad grip on turf. My Pro SL’s have better grip than my old shoes with softspikes. No slips, no issues on side hills or going up and down mounds. During my swing, it feels like my feet are anchored down which is what I want.
LOVE how the sole flares out a bit for added stability. Channeling the old XPS-1 shoes that I used to have. Great job.
Stability: Excellent. The soles flare out a bit from the foot, providing additional stability. It’s one feature that my old XPS-1 shoes had that I loved. Full swings from the tee box, shots from the fairway or rough…felt very secure.
The additional support from the synthetic strap going from the heel to the top of the lacing area is a nice touch for added stability.
Look: Average. If I have one complaint about these shoes, it’s the look. They’re not exactly a modern looking shoe. My first thought when seeing them was that they look like bowling shoes. I do wish they’d adopt a more modern look that other brands seem to be doing. With that being said, I’ll sacrifice looks for performance.
Overall: Excellent. Foot Joy does one thing well, and that’s golf. To their credit they don’t try to get into other sports or make some ‘training’ shoe. Unlike companies that see golf as one line on an org chart, Foot Joy only does golf. And they do it very well. They make widths from extra narrow to extra wide (I really wish Ecco would make wide widths but they don’t which means they’re a non-starter for me). They don’t introduce new lines every year for every model, which is not the norm in the industry. Overall, they’re outstanding shoes and I’m looking forward to getting plenty of rounds out of them.
Song Of The Day
Johnny Marr’s solo records have a distinctive sound their own. Bit of social distancing here from a few years ago.
Linus is hoping everyone enjoys the holiday season!
What a year 2019 has been. Stop for a moment and let’s reflect on everything that has happened over the last 12 months. I’m sitting here by the fireplace having a cup of hot cocoa* (I’m drinking my fifth tumbler of rye on the rocks but calling it cocoa) while my dog snores and farts. What could possibly make this frigid evening better? Why it’s the arrival of the 2019 Golf Digest Holiday Gift Guide! Behold!
Unlike last year, there are no leggings or pantaloons of any kind. I DEMAND PANTALOONS. In tartan, of course. I want tartan everything. GIVE ME YOUR FINEST TARTAN! MOISTURE WICKING TARTAN!
Since there is no tartan, the people at Golf Digest have been busy at work putting together a list of items that they believe are what golfers want for the holidays (they are, as usual, wrong). So let’s take a look at the fine offerings that have been curated for my discerning taste, shall we?
And like last year, much thanks to Drew Magary for inspiring this. Hopefully you land on your feet and are blessed with many ramekins of delicious treats.
Beats Solo 3 Wireless Headphones
Price: $200.
They say: A look, feel and sound that’s bold— even if your music isn’t. The fine-tuned acoustics will make any track bounce.
SGIC says: The human clown car wearing headphones that appear to be from the Guy Fieri collection is going to be an absolute delight for that 7-hour round, but that’s okay while Logan listens to some godforsaken world music while taking 4 minutes to miss a six-footer for a triple bogey. The social skills of a fence post, four practice swings, taking pictures of EVERYTHING (for the ‘gram, naturally) and the inability to break 120 come standard with these. Unless you’re dropping that bass at the club during your DJ gig these are a total waste. It’s as bad as assholes who wear Apple Air Buds everywhere.
Demerbox Game Day DB2 Speaker
Price: $349
They say: Built into a durable pelican case, this waterproof outdoor speaker delivers storage and professional-grade sound quality in an ultra-portable design.
SGIC says: To quote from Judge Smails, CUT THAT OUT! $350 for something that looks like an emergency repair kit you’d keep in your car? Is listening to Nickelback really that big of a deal? I point this out because it’s an absolute guarantee that people who insist on taking something like this with them to the course have terrible taste in music and will be hard of hearing ensuring everyone gets to listen to their dirge. Sure glad it’s ultra-portable though. Portable just isn’t enough.
Psychobunny Aaron Windbreaker
Price: $198
They say: A packable, wind-and-waterproof jacket that will pop even under the darkest skies.
SGIC says: Confession: I own a psychobunny tshirt. Pretty plain, tiny logo. Overpriced. Exactly how I feel about this. For $200 I can buy something from Zero Restriction that I know is actually waterproof. Plus, it wasn’t designed for golf so how well it holds up with a golf swing is up for debate. Who’s Aaron, by the way?
Mont Blanc Sunglasses
Price: $2,020 (not a typo).
They say: The subtle map design on these titanium glasses is only visible from the outside, giving them a crisp, out-of-this-world look.
SGIC says: When I spend two grand on sunglasses three things happen. 1) She Who Is Really In Charge does not react well and gives me the death stare 2) I look like a complete dipshit 3) I will drop them and ruin them. I spent $220 on a pair of custom golf-specific Oakley sunglasses 7 years ago and still question the decision (I still have them and like them). But wow, I never bought sunglasses that have a subtle map design that’s visible from the outside before. I bet wearing these will impress Aiden, Muffy and Trevor at the club while we complain about the poors and drink Dr. Pepper from $200 stemware. And when I think of sunglasses, I always want to go with a company best known for making pens. Christ- it’s like someone from Golf Digest thinks that your average reader is thinking “I mean, I could spend two grand on a golf trip to Myrtle but man I need sunglasses that make me look like a douchebag!”
Blair’s Belts Alligator Belt
Price: $295
They say: A luxe leather cash cover to keep your green safe and stylish.
SGIC says: You can’t buy this unless you get the matching belt and shoes. BTW, you know who could totally pull this off? Phil. I’m sure that when he’s in Saudi Arabia it’ll go over well with the Sheik at the Palace. That’s it. You, me, anyone else? Hell no. Who buys someone a $300 wallet other than people who read the Robb Report and complain how it’s gone all mainstream and think Wheels Up is tacky.
Casio Pro Terek Smart WSD-F30 GPS Watch
Price: $549. Not a typo.
They say: A quality outdoor watch with the golf and smartwatch features you need. Get hole layouts and yardages via the Hole19 app, track activity, receive notifications and review forecasts on a compact-yet-vivid design.
SGIC says: Eat shit. I’d rather listen to the 877-KARS-4-KIDS song in a broom closet with the two goobers from MVMT watching JB Holmes lose pace to an ice floe than spend $550 on a Casio watch. It’s a watch. It tells time. You know what works great for a GPS device is your smart phone with the Hole19 app, or a rangefinder. You can watch porn on your smartphone (from what I hear). Casio watches should never cost more than a case of PBR. Hell, they should come with one. SGIC 2020, buy a case of beer, get a free Casio watch! Plus, you know that the asshole using this thing will need three minutes to get his yardage nailed down so he can duck hook a 3-wood into a hazard.
Bluegrass Fairway Waxed Canvas Valuables Pouch
Price: $38
They say: Handmade in the United States, this water-resistant pouch is lined with a soft, tartan fabric to keep your valuables protected inside and out.
SGIC says: Tartan fabric, people! Now we’re talking. I NEED TARTAN. I’m a supporter of BIG TARTAN. But $38? Someone should buy this for an office gift exchange just to make the “you can put your balls in it!” joke. You know what’s cheaper and better? A Crown Royal pouch (my personal option). And with the pouch, you get a free bottle of Crown Royal! Put the Pine Valley or Masters logo on it and they’ll fly off the shelf. This thing looks like it should have a bolo tie in it or something.
G/FORE Pray For Birdies Beanie
Price: $120
They say: A soft cashmere-wool hat to keep you warm and under par all winter long.
SGIC says: It’s a toque. Skull cap…sure. Beanie sounds like something Flounder from ‘Animal House’ would wear to try to pledge Delta House. There’s a guy named Trevor or Hunter in Brooklyn who will totally buy this. Serious golfers? No chance. It’s golf apparel for people who don’t play golf. Pass.
Crab & Cleek Turkish Towels
Price: $32 each
They say: For a unique and elegant addition to the bag, these customizable Turkish cotton golf towels have a terry-cloth liner that will keep your clubs fresh.
SGIC says: Some poor bastard is getting this for Christmas along with a set of neoprene iron covers and a set of naked lady tees right before they decide to ditch golf and take up lawn darts or huffing glue as their preferred recreational activity. I mean, do you really need TURKISH cotton? Is Pima or Egyptian cotton not good enough anymore? I used “borrowed” gym towels that worked great. Think about what you use your towel for; do you really need fine Turkish cotton? No. You do not.
Theragun Liv
Price: $249 and your pride
They say: This massage gun uses percussive therapy—or rapid, repetitive strokes—to stimulate blood flow and heat for more effective muscle recovery, pain management and stress relief.
SGIC says: This thing looks like someone duct-taped a Hitachi Wand on a triangle. I mean, I bet a lot of people can use this for stress relief and to stimulate blood flow (hey-yoooo). I totally get that. But…THIS LOOKS LIKE A VIBRATOR. Like something you’d see on an Adam & Eve infomercial (something I’d never, ever watch). And $250? No, I don’t know what size batteries this uses nor do I know if you can some how link it to your smartphone.
Hay Sowden Bottle
Price: $35 (12 ounce) $40 (17 ounce).
They say: Make hydration more appealing with this stainless-steel bottle that’s suitable for hot or cold drinks and looks like a work of art.
SGIC says: They look like giant salt and pepper shakers that are plotting revenge. 40 bucks for a water bottle that holds less than 20 ounces? GTFO. Buy a Yeti. Cheaper, bigger and they work great. This looks like something you’d use on your Peloton (presumably beating your husband with it for blowing 2 grand on an exercise bike). Oh, and those ‘videos’ you can watch with the instructors? I hate those people. If you ever see me inside a Soul Cycle call 911 because I’ve been kidnapped.
Imperial The Breck Rope Cap
Price: $30 and all the ridicule you can handle
They say: This customizable corduroy hat was inspired by a piece in the company’s 1988 collection—bringing enduring style and refinement to winter attire.
SGIC says: You should get a free bowl of soup with this, because at least then you’d have soup. When I think of refinement in haberdashery, corduroy isn’t what I’m thinking of. Rope hats are ugly so by all means let’s bring them back. Throw this thing into an active volcano. Seriously…corduroy? On a hat?
J Lindberg Clint Wool Coolmax Sweater
Price: $225 (therapy not included)
They say: A moisture-wicking, breathable wool-blend layer that will add class, color and warmth to any outfit.
SGIC says: A huge epic fail. No big and tall sizes because J Lindberg is made for 12-year old boys who resemble a match stick, plus it’s the kind ugly where you need two of these: 1 to shit on, the other to cover up said shit with. Who’s spending $225 to look like you eat crayons because they taste good?
Seamus X Denton Watts Skull & Crossbones Field Book (scorecard holder)
Price: $95
They say: Ready to record the deadliest of scores, this white-leather scorecard holder can double as a passport protector.
SGIC says: If you wear a white belt with black socks and play from the tips despite your 22 index, have we got a deal for you. No. Absolutely not. When the economy craters next year (consumer debt is at an all-time high per capita) people are going to look at crap like this and question their judgement. As they should. The first person to DM me will get a free scorecard holder that came with a purchase from TGW.
Jones X Buscemi Slide
Price: $200. For slides.
They say: Handmade in Italy, these limited-edition slides offer the simple elegance your feet deserve after 18 holes.
SGIC says: Huzzah! Tut tut…surely Trevor and Lord Shinytaint will not have someone wearing these in the Members Grill after 18 holes. The humanity! One exception: wear these bad boys with knee-high black socks and see what happens. But hurry…they’re limited edition! You don’t want BIG SANDAL getting over on you, do you? Does buying a pair of these get you lunch with Steve Buscemi? Asking for a friend. Can you wear them while getting sun on your bunghole?
Hillrock Estate Solera-Aged Bourbon
Price: $100
They say: This groundbreaking New York State bourbon hangs with Kentucky’s best.
SGIC says: What does Solera aged mean? Bourbon is aged is wood casks. There is literally no solera involved. Bourbon is Solera-free. I could recommend a half-dozen bourbons that would be much better (and cheaper) than this. It’s like one of their staffers was in the Hudson Valley and stumbled upon this. It’s like claiming the best crab cakes come from Oklahoma.
That’s it. You’re not buying any of this garbage.
What if, say, you’re reading this and you want to get your favourite golfer something for Christmas? A few really good options:
Go to your local golf course and buy 1-2 dozen of their preferred make/model of balls. Super easy, and they’ll be happy.
Treating them to a round or two at a great course that they have wanted to play. They’ll think of you…it’s a win-win!
If they’re new to the game or want to improve, a lessons package at your local course (or some place like GolfTec) is a great option.
Are they in the market for new clubs? Schedule them a fitting at said local course or a club fitter in your area (use your search engine of choice). It’s a great way for them to maximize those dollars and again- they’ll think of you when they’re getting fitted and start hitting your mid-irons stiff on a regular basis.
If you have deep pockets, treat them to a weekend getaway somewhere nice that has golf that they can use come spring. The RTJ Golf Trail, Myrtle Beach, Kiawah Island, Charleston SC, Scottsdale/Phoenix, Orlando are all great options with plenty of non-golf things to do.
As I head into the Senior Tour age group, I played one final round as a 40-something on Saturday at Oak Creek in Upper Marlboro. I hadn’t been there before and have heard some promising things. Overall, it’s an interesting layout that is definitely NOT walkable under any circumstances. The course is built into a gated housing development (they’re pretty serious about it; the course is considered to be semi-private which I took to mean that residents had some kind of privileges which makes sense), and the distances between the 1st and 2nd holes combined with the 9th and 10th holes are exhaustive (and involve crossing a busy street). It’s pretty tree-lined on most holes so being accurate off the tee is important. The vast majority of holes are straightforward. A few dogleg holes here and there but nothing particularly crazy.
8th hole at Oak Creek. Avoid right, bit of a bail-out left and short.
What I liked:
Most holes have bail-out areas short and have chipping areas around the green.
The first hole is a true handshake hole; short par 4 that requires accuracy but otherwise not a brute.
Greens were straightforward; no multi-tier greens with severe breaks.
Pro shop seemed to be well-stocked and has a grab and go area for beverages and snacks.
Bermuda tee boxes and fairways were in decent shape.
Six sets of tees with distances ranging from 6,980 (tips) to 4,443 (orange).
Scorecard had tee box my handicap index recommendations. I’d suggest posting this on the 1st tee in plain view.
Saw a few water stations that seemed to be fresh (on a warm and humid morning ice water is really, really good).
4th hole at Oak Creek, waiting for the first group. Like putting JB Holmes and Patrick Cantlay out first. You drive through the barn on the right, and if you’re Brian Burke, you can have a barn fight!
What I didn’t like:
Greens were in less than ideal shape. The biggest issue was the large number of un-repaired ball marks. If I were the superintendent I’d be livid. Not sure why. I know that outings are notorious for ignoring them (not an excuse on any level). I’d strongly suggest making this an issue, and go over how to repair a ball-mark. I made a point of fixing mine plus at least 1 on every hole. I’d suggest mentioning this to groups. I can see how the greens could be really good with this happening.
Roughs had several dead areas. I’m inclined to give the course a break on this one given how hot and humid July has been (the Bermuda fairways were, for the most part, in decent shape). Tee boxes were hit and miss. Being tree lined you also had some shady areas that may not be getting much sunlight.
The first group out (we were 2nd) was a foursome whose pace of play was glacial (very much got the vibe that they were members or something). We passed them after the 5th hole after getting tired of waiting on them on every shot. The marshal we ran into between 12 and 13 admitted as much. Again, if you don’t tell them to pick up the pace they never will. Your first groups should be fast players. You don’t put slowpokes out first.
No half-way house (the routing kind of meanders through the development), no beverage cart. Their email said that they would send out a beverage cart based on demand so at least they explained their policy. Even an ice machine/water station would be nice.
13th hole from the tee box. Visually intimidating but some bail-out areas abound.
Overall it’s not bad. If you’re playing on a weekend note that it’s near Six Flags America so take that into account for driving. The exit that they tell you to take on the Beltway is closed (15A); I took 15B and made liberal use of my u-turn skills. It’s also easy to get to off of 301. If you have a tee time on a Sunday when the Redskins have a home game (the stadium is 1-2 exits away) be warned. In the end, I had fun. It’s a 45-60 minute hike for me so I may not be in a massive rush to play it again, but unfortunately this seems to becoming the new normal for golf.
1ST VISIT TO 2ND SWING
So having been curious since they opened, I went to the new 2nd Swing in Columbia this afternoon not knowing what to expect. I was…impressed.
When the pushcart mafia rolls up on you they mean business.
Clubs were sorted by brand and style (woods, irons, wedges) in a very straight-forward and easy to find fashion. Prices were sorted by condition.
Ton of kids and beginner sets.
Nearly a dozen hitting bays that were huge. I mean YUUUUGE.
Large area for putters with plenty of space and a separate fitting station that was getting used. I was really impressed; if I was in the market for a new flat stick I’d definitely visit.
Decent selection of bags (mostly cart bags with some carry bags).
Solid selection of soft goods (balls, hats, etc.).
They also had a station doing new/replacement grips.
Near a long row of hitting bays and an aisle of clubs. Not pictured- they have a few stations with Trackman.
I walked out with two new hats (my preferred brand/style) and a new towel (my preferred brand) for far less than I’d pay otherwise. It’s a fantastic addition to the area and a welcome option (I love Golf Galaxy but getting over there on a weekend while fighting Costco traffic is at best difficult).
Play well, stay cool, and here’s to plenty of pars, birdies and eagles.
FootJoy ProSL. Side and outsole/spikeless pattern. Shockingly good grip.
Like a lot of golfers my age and older, my first few pair of golf shoes had metal spikes. I still remember my first pair; all white Etonics that had a wingtip design. The click-clack of metal spikes on pavement or a cart path is such a distinct sound. At the time, spikeless shoes were starting to be made, but most of them resembled gridiron astro-turf shoes and had little if any grip (which was fine if you’re playing a flat course with no wet spots, but otherwise not so good).
The last pair of spiked shoes I owned were a pair of Nike (pre-Tiger Woods) I purchased in the mid 1990’s. After that, it’s been soft-spikes on anything I’ve played in for the better part of 20 years until a few months ago.
My interest in spikeless shoes started when I saw Fred Couples wearing them at The Masters (2010 or 2012 if I recall correctly), which I found curious. If someone like Couples (with his history of back trouble) would wear something like that on a course that has a ton of elevation change, then he must be getting plenty of grip and traction. Admittedly I’ve always liked Freddie’s swing and how smooth and effective it is (maybe some envy as well).
Seeing companies make an effort at putting together good spikeless shoes furthered my interest so I began doing research. I heard great things about Ecco but they don’t make their shoes in widths (which is mind-boggling). I also looked at New Balance but if I’m being honest I wasn’t impressed at their golf shoes, so it was down to Foot Joy (one of the few companies that make golf shoes in an extra-wide width).
Side view shot of my FootJoy Pro SL.
Buying: Excellent. Their site is pretty easy to navigate and get information about their different models. Their color selection wasn’t the greatest (they don’t seem to make a lot of their bolder options in the XW width), but found a pair in my size. Shipping was a breeze and they showed up 1-2 days earlier than expected. If I have one complaint, it’s the lack of color options with the XW sizes.
**Note: FootJoy did not provide me with any free product, upgraded shipping or any consideration. The review is my opinion solely; they were not consulted or advised I would be writing a review.
Comfort: Good. I also have a pair of Hyperflex II shoes which I like. The outsole doesn’t sit up as high and I feared wouldn’t have the same cushion. It’s a firmer feel, but still very cushioned. Size-wise they run true to other FootJoy models; for me this means sizing down since I’m 1/2 size smaller in Footjoy than I am in other shoes.
Waterproofing: Excellent. I haven’t had the chance to wear them in rain yet, but several mornings of being a dew-sweeper gave them a pretty solid test. No issues. They breathe okay and held up to several rounds in the desert in hot conditions.
Grip: Outstanding; far better than I was expecting. This was the single biggest surprise with these shoes. From shots off the tee to shots in the fairway, rough, bunkers, and sidehill/uphill/downhill lies, my feet felt very anchored in. At no point did I fear my foot slipping. From the first shot, when it almost felt like I could feel my feet ‘locking in’ to the turf to putting out on my most recent round, grip has been outstanding. Better than most shoes that have softspikes, and I’m not kidding at all. Easily my favorite thing about them. Still blown away at how good they grip.
Stability: Outstanding. I like a wide outsole, and these have it. At no point did I fear rolling over. Very functional; does what you expect. They’re a bit heavier than my Hyperflex II shoes as a comparison.
Look: Average/Below Average. When they first came out, my thought was that they looked like bowling shoes and I didn’t really like how they looked (the first color pattern of black and white still have that bowling shoe look, in my opinion). Probably my least favorite part of the shoe. I thought about buying all white instead of the white/tan I bought; I think I’d probably go for the all white if I had to do it over again. Still think they look a bit like bowling shoes.
Overall: Outstanding. Looks aside, FootJoy hit a home run. Fit, function, comfort, stability and grip are outstanding. Okay, so these aren’t sexy. They’re damn good golf shoes. If you’re thinking about a new pair, or adding a pair of spikeless shoes to your collection, I strongly recommend taking at look at the ProSL.
When it comes to shoes I’m fickle. I have wide feet with high arches, and unlike most people I don’t pronate (I under-pronate or supinate). So buying golf shoes can be a bit of a challenge at best.
My new Footjoy Hyperflex 2 Golf Shoes. From the top.
I don’t have the Adidas shoes currently (if they made golf shoes in a EEE Width (they don’t) I’d probably buy from them since the one pair I bought was great save for the fact it wasn’t wide enough). If your feet are normal width they have some fantastic looking product.
For me, I’ve had my best luck with Footjoy. Not because they give me anything or because they’re nice people (they may well be) but because their product fits my foot and is comfortable. I got 4 very productive years out of their old XPS-1 shoes (ask your parents, kids) before they started coming apart. I tried a pair of New Balance shoes (lightweight, but not a lot of ventilation (my feet would be incredibly sweaty after a round)) and didn’t care for them at all, so this past March I went back to Footjoy.
After emailing their customer service team, they recommended the Hyperflex II as the closest thing to my beloved XPS-1’s. Placed an order, and within a few days they showed up at my house.
From the bottom. A lot of yellow, and a lot of fantastic grip on turf.
I’ve held off doing a review because initial reviews are rarely that good; most newer golf shoes are well made so they should easily hold up out of the box. But what about after 30 rounds over the majority of a season? Would they still feel good in October the same way they do in late March? Read on.
Comfort: Outstanding. When I first put them on they felt better than any golf shoes I’d ever worn before. Slipped right on without any issues. The last time I wore them a week ago, they still feel great. Haven’t had any blisters or sore feet after rounds (used to have issues with my New Balance shoes). The white cushioning is firm (good for bigger lads like myself) without being overly plush. Even after 30 rounds they still feel good. The cushioning hasn’t broken down and other than the spikes starting to wear down (expected) they feel as good as they did out of the box.
From the side. The white portion has firm cushioning yet is stable. Bravo.
Waterproofing: Above average. Morning rounds in dewy/wet conditions haven’t been an issue nor have a couple rounds in light/moderate rain.
Grip: Outstanding. I’ve never slipped, and even going down steep hills I’ve never had an issue with the shoes. They have replaceable soft-spike cleats which for the most part don’t leave a big impression on the greens.
Stability: Above average. The soles flare out a bit (it’s one of the things I loved about my XPS-1 shoes) but not that much. I’d like it if they flared out more (I have a tendency to roll my ankle a bit in my downswing) but that’s my only quibble and it’s a minor one.
Look: Average. They’re golf shoes. They’re not a traditional wing-tip or a saddle shoe, but those seem to be going the way of the persimmon driver. They’re not hideously ugly, they don’t look like Sketchers, and I like the yellow sole.
Overall: Outstanding. I’ll admit I was a bit apprehensive when I ordered these but I’ve been pleasantly surprised. It has some elements of a traditional golf shoe but with lightweight stability a
nd comfort that should be expected. If you’re in the market for new kicks, you could do a hell of a lot worse.
Song of the Day:
Waking up to hearing about the events that happened in Las Vegas overnight was horrifying.
I have many happy memories of my visits to Las Vegas (I could probably write a novella about them); love, lust, great golf, bad decisions, and a host of other things. This song always takes me back to a 1992 trip (back when I was living in Southern California). Driving through the desert at sunset on a hot July evening and hearing this song on the radio. A simpler time, when everything seemed possible. The last 25 years have been a lot of things, but more than once I think about that car ride through the desert, hearing this song, and wondering but what if.
The Cocteau Twins were never a major commercial hit. This is probably their most well-known song. Always brings a smile to my face. Hope it does the same to you.
From the 4th tee at Blue Mash. Don’t go left. Or long. Or right.
Despite temperatures that were 30 degrees cooler than the day before, I had an enjoyable round on Sunday 3/26 at Blue Mash which remains one of the better public tracks in Central Maryland. Unlike my 2015 visit to its sister course Waverly Woods, pace of pace was not an issue at all. The other twosome I was paired with moved on as the cold weather was too much for them (they played the front nine and called it a day), Playing with the guy I got paired with as a twosome, we finished 18 holes in 3 hours and 10 minutes (and that was with a your humble scribe requiring a stop for refreshments between nines).
Despite the up-and-down weather of late, for the most part, Blue Mash was in good shape when I played it with a couple notable exceptions. The driving range is currently mats only while their green grass portion comes back (it’s currently covered with a plastic tarp). As you can see from my photos, much of the turf-grass is still brown, but that’s not really surprising (the turf played fine; if anything it was nice that the rough wasn’t really a factor and easy to play from). The greens rolled pretty true (it’s hard to tell but there’s a lot more break in them than it appears).
It’s been five years since I played Blue Mash so it was a bit of unfamiliar territory. For those unfamiliar, Blue Mash doesn’t ease you into your round. The first 3 holes are long par 4’s that are as difficult of an opening stretch that exists in the DMV. Once you escape that, you’ve got a medium-length par 3 (photo above( to a well-protected green and a medium length par 5 that has jail the entire left side of the hole.
5th hole at Blue Mash from approx 150 out. Trees left, water right. Whee!
The short 7th and 8th holes look inviting (and easy) enough on the scorecard, but any mistake off the tee and there’s trouble all over the place.
Once you hit the back nine, you have to contend with water for the first few holes, with 11 (a long par 3 into the prevailing wind) requiring a fairly stout carry over water to a well-protected green.
12th hole from the fairway at Blue Mash. The water on the right side isn’t for decoration.
So Blue Mash remains a stout test for area golfers. I’m not going to claim to be Bradley Klein of Golfweek, but three notes about the course design:
1) Unless you’ve a knee that is problematic on a good day like I do, the course is a fairly easy walk. No big distances between holes and no real elevation changes of note. If courses want more people walking this is one way to make this happen.
2) No homes. Not even kidding on this one. The entire area is nothing but golf course.
3) The green complexes are all well protected; several holes have large bunkers (I know since I found my way in them) in the front of the green. This came into play because on a cold day the ball doesn’t travel as far as it normally would and being off a few yards had some unpleasant consequences.
So all in all, Blue Mash is well worth a visit. They have a practice green, a short game green and a range that is currently mats only but should convert to their green grass once we get into season.
SHOE REVIEW
Finally wore my Foot-Joy Hyperflex II shoes during my round at Blue Mash. Out of the box they felt really good, but I will do a review once I get 3-5 rounds played in them.
SONG OF THE DAY
Alan Hawkshaw is a musical savant. Put this on and if this doesn’t make you want to fix a cocktail or twelve then I can’t help you. Things are weird. Sometimes you’ve just got to let go a bit. This isn’t yacht rock. It’s something else entirely.
With the untimely demise and departure of my beloved Foot Joy XPS-1 shoes (damn you Foot Joy for discontinuing them), I was forced to look elsewhere for a new pair of shoes this year once the XPS shoes starting coming apart (to be fair, I had them for 3 years and wore them in a variety of conditions.
My options are limited because I have a very wide foot; I’ve had minimal luck with Adidas (they were okay comfort wise but I wanted a more stable platform), so I started looking. I’ve never had good luck with Nike (I bought a pair of their shoes 20 years ago and regretted it after one round- uncomfortable and two spikes came out mid-round) and Puma just feel terrible on my feet.
I’ve been a fan of the soft spikes since they came out, and trying on a pair of spikeless shoes, I immediately scratched this off my options. Since I tend to play early morning rounds and given that we do get a bit of rain here, a spikeless shoe made no sense (I immediately began having concerns about safety and stability). If I was going somewhere like Palm Springs or Scottsdale (dry areas that get little rain) I’d probably reconsider, but in our climate? No thanks.
Seeing that New Balance were entering the golf shoe market, I was intrigued. They make wide width sneakers that I’ve had decent luck with (currently I’ve leaned toward Asics but I still have a pair of New Balance shoes in rotation), so I did some digging. They make a “minimal” shoe but my size and need for stability ruled that out pretty much immediately.
After some digging and research, I settled on the NBG2002 shoe (photo from New Balance) because they had it in a 4E width and it met my requirements.
New Balance 2002NBG shoes (photo New Balance)
I put them in rotation in late June, so the review is after a dozen rounds (a good sample size, it seems)
Comfort: Out of the box, the initial feel was very light and very comfortable. There’s ample cushion. They’re very light. If you’re not used to this (and I wasn’t) it’s a bit of a pleasant surprise. While I do ride when I play, as we know, you still end up doing a bit of walking.
Grip/support: The spike design isn’t bad (see photo below taken after 12 rounds).
Spike pattern (2 in the heel, 5 in the forefoot).
The spikes provide plenty of grip in both flat and hilly lies as well as in the sand. In terms of support, the base of the shoe isn’t as wide as my XPS-1 shoes were. Ideally it would be wider but it’s not horrendously different.
Waterproofing: So far, the waterproofing has held up. If I do have one complaint, the shoes aren’t that breathable compared to other shoes I’ve owned. If you buy a pair and you keep them in a shoe bag, I HIGHLY recommend taking them out of the bag after your round and let them dry naturally. They have held up in early morning rounds, but they do make my feet sweat something to beat the band.
Appearance: I’m something of a traditionalist when it comes to shoes, so you’ll never see me wearing the Rickie Fowler orange. I don’t mind a bit of colour, but from the so-called “mirror test” I’m happy with how these look. My photos don’t really show it but I like the tone-on-tone hexagonal motif (the first picture from New Balance picks it up).
Side View NBG2002. The yoga mat is not mine.
Durability: After 12 rounds, frankly it’s hard to say. They appear to be holding up okay, but being somewhat large, my added tonnage probably doesn’t help things.
Overall: The lack the shoe breathing notwithstanding, they’re comfortable. If you wear orthotics the sockliner insert comes out (it’s the green thing you can see). They grip fairly well (no slips so far), and are pretty comfortable. I’m not that happy that New Balance isn’t making a 4E width in their higher-end models (seriously- WHY NOT?). If I was to add things to my want list, I’d like to see a customize option where I could get a pair with a certain English Premier League Team logo that happens to wear New Balance (if they do that or figure out how to let me get a Maple Leafs logo…then here- just take my money).
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