Tag: Golf Channel (page 1 of 4)

Fixing The Olympic Golf Format (You’re Welcome)

July 28, 2021 / / 0 Comments

Your 2024 Olympic Golf Captain? Maybe!

With the Tokyo Olympics now mid-way through the first week, I thought now would be a good time to figure out how to fix the golf format.  I have the added bonus of getting to wear an air cast for the next few weeks so it’s not like I’m playing anytime soon.  As horrible as the IOC is (I’ve long put them in a sports ‘Axis of Evil’ alongside the NCAA and FIFA, two other entities that serve up their unique brands of corruption, grift and a real hatred of the athletes under their umbrellas), the Olympics continue to provide a shop window that few other sporting events can provide.  It’s the only reason to put up with the IOC.

While a 72-hole stroke play event does provide the players (and core fans) with a familiar feel, the truth is that it does seem like ‘just another event’ minus prize money.  So let’s make some changes, shall we?  I’ve had two bourbons, which is my sweet spot for Good Idea Thinking.  Under my format, the players will play five rounds (at the most) instead of four, but with an additional competition.  I’ll explain.

This will mean that there will be a total of eight days of competition, which is the same exact amount you currently have so the course would not be used any more/less than it would.  I would leave the number of players at 120 (60 men, 60 women).  So far, nothing changes.  The host club (Riviera in 2028 is a fantastic choice), if private, isn’t being unduly put upon any more than they already were.

In the interest of being fair, I flipped a coin and the women will start their event first (it’s largely interchangeable) rather than the men.  The first three days are the women’s team event (30 two-player teams) which will be 54 holes with a cut after two rounds.  Then men’s team event is the same format (30 two-player teams, 54 holes).  Countries would send players in even numbers based on world rankings.  So the men’s and women’s events get cut from 72 to 54 holes to add a 36-hole mixed team event.

Competition Day 1: Women’s Team Event (alternate shot format)

Day 2: Women’s Team Event (foursomes/two-player best ball format).

After the second round, the field is cut to the top 12-18 teams (and ties).  I’m flexible on how deep the cut should be.  Maybe anyone within 8-10 shots of the lead gets through.

Day 3: Women’s Team event final round.  Two-player best-ball format, scores reset so everyone starts the final round at level par.

Medals are awarded in the Women’s Team event.

Then two rest/practice days.

The next event will be a mixed-team event (one male, one female).  With 120 players you’d need a two-tee start (apologies in advance to Justine Reed as her husband and his playing partner will undoubtedly get a “late, then early” start time) but with summer you can easily get players around in plenty of time (Brisbane in 2032 could be tight since it won’t be during their summer but it’s still doable; they get around 11 hours of sunlight in August).  The women would tee off from a forward tee 12-14% shorter than what the men will play, in line with USGA research.

Day 4: Mixed Team event (alternate shot)

Day 5: Mixed Team event (foursomes/two-player best ball)

Medals are awarded in the Mixed team event.

Two rest/practice days.

Competition Day 6: Men’s Team Event (alternate shot format)

Day 7: Men’s Team Event (foursomes/two-player best ball format).

After the second round, the field is cut to the top 12-18 teams (and ties).  As noted earlier, I’m flexible on how deep the cut should be.  Maybe anyone within 8-10 shots of the lead gets through.

Day 8: Men’s Team event final round.  Two-player best-ball format, scores reset so everyone starts the final round at level par.

Medals are awarded in the Men’s Team event.

Nations would require at least four athletes to be eligible (two men, two women) in the top 300 in the world.  This is similar to minimal qualification standards that the IOC already has in place for other events (call it the “Eddie the Eagle” rule).  In lieu of professional status, advancing to the quarter-final stage or better in one of several elite amateur events would also suffice (US Amateur, British Amateur, Asia-Pacific Amateur, etc.).

Restarting the final rounds at 0 for the men’s and women’s events means nobody can play it safe and that any team making that cut has a chance.

This means that there are more medals to compete with, and cutting the men’s and women’s event to 54 holes cuts down on wear and tear and would allow players to arrive late/leave early if they wanted to do that.

Some other rules that I’m adding:

-Men may wear shorts during tournament rounds (the shorts must be the same color as the pants as part of the team’s uniforms, which means if Great Britain is wearing blue pants, players can wear blue shorts) if they choose.

-Max score of double par on any hole during the qualifying rounds (Days 1-2 and 6-7).

-Rangefinders/GPS devices are legal so long as they do not have the slope option engaged.

-American men (looking at you, DJ and others) who qualify and refuse to go over are ineligible for Ryder Cup/Presidents Cup “unless” they have already played in an Olympic event.  My long-held belief is that the Olympics should be a “once in a lifetime” thing for athletes.  Play once, and the option of opting out of future Olympics if the player chooses.  The European Tour can do similar if they choose.

-No caddies (players can use push/pull carts or carry their bags as they prefer) during tournament rounds, however each nation would have a designated non-playing captain (and ONE assistant captain) that the team can consult with prior to and after rounds, along with one three-minute ‘time out’ after the 9th hole.  Three minutes between nines isn’t going to hold things up.

-The IOC will work with the R&A and the USGA for a tournament ball which must be used by all competitors in all rounds.  This would eliminate any confusion about teams having to figure out what ball to use.  The non-playing captain would (for countries with multiple entries) decide who will partner up with whom.  The ball should be made available to players at least 90 days before the start of the Olympics to any players who are possibly eligible so they can get used to it.

-Ties for medal places will be decided in a sudden-death playoff.

-Winning an Olympic event (if professional) provides a 4-year exemption on said player’s tour.  If you want to elevate the event you have to treat it like one.  It also includes entry into the next three years of all major championships.

-The IOC pays for charter flights to take the players from the last tour stop prior to the games to the host city (if they can do it for NHL players they can do it for the best golfers in the world).

So eight days of competition, and six days of practice/off days for a total of 14 days.  This would mean that the players would have the opportunity to march in the opening and closing ceremonies if they chose to since for many, this is a huge component of attending.  Or, they can opt to come in later/leave earlier.  Flexibility.

A team event would level the playing field to a degree and offer something different and unique (and we’ve all been wanting to see a mixed-team event).  The idea came to me from watching the mixed curling at the 2018 Winter Olympics (the men and the women had their own separate events in addition to the team competition).  The schedule builds rest and practice in which (assuming we’re not dealing with a pandemic in Paris) allows the players to have that Olympic experience in every possible way.  Similar, but unique and for most, a true once-in-a-lifetime event which is what the Olympics should be.

 

Some 2021 Golf Predictions You Probably Didn’t Ask For

January 2, 2021 / / 0 Comments

I see things…

Why, hello there.  It’s New Year’s Day 2021, and we’re all still here.  Nobody’s hung over because we were all responsible and stayed home in small groups rather than going out to large parties (unless you’re rich or an elected official, in which case fill your boots on the taxpayer dime).  After an off-season of a few weeks, the 2021 PGA Tour golf season starts next week in Hawaii.  The LPGA gets things going a few weeks later in Florida (I know I say this all the time, but seriously- if you only have time to watch one tour, watch the LPGA).

I’m sure that there are those who have made predictions on every event already, and while I admire their commitment, I’m not that writer.  I just don’t have the time to keep up, and neither do you in all likelihood.  However, I’ve put together some prognostications about the game that I’ve broken down into the following categories: Professional Tours, Media/Publications/Equipment, and Local News.

PRO TOURS

One of the California West Coast events is getting moved/postponed/canceled.  The COVID situation in Southern California is beyond dire (they’re out of hospital beds and are turning away patients from hospitals).  They had to move the Rose Bowl game to Texas.  If you look at the events in La Quinta (Amex), La Jolla (Farmers Insurance) and LA (Genesis), it’s hard to see these events taking place unless there is a massive sea change in cases.  For the record, I’m hoping that this doesn’t happen and that the caseloads in California plummet and everything reverts to pre-COVID world.

We will see another fan-less West Coast swing and (unfortunately) a fan-less Masters.  This isn’t political.  COVID isn’t going to go away because of a new administration.  If 35-40% of the population keeps going around thinking that it’s some giant hoax, then nothing is going to change.

The 2022 PGA Championship is getting moved.  My out-of-the-box suggestion?  Cancel the Genesis in February and move the 2021 PGA from Kiawah to Riviera.  Then play the 2022 PGA Championship at Kiawah Island.  If the PGA of America thought the 1990 event was unpleasant, playing the 2022 event where its scheduled to be held will be far worse.

A Canadian man and at least one American woman are going to win majors in 2021.

Bryson DeChambeau will win at least one event and will skip an event due to injury.

Two of the men’s major winners will be first-time winners.

Europe will retain the Ryder Cup.

At least one prominent American male player will opt out of participating in the Olympics.

MEDIA/EQUIPMENT/PUBLICATIONS

CBS and NBC will continue the trial balloon of dumping some weekend coverage onto their over-the-top streaming services (CBS All Access and Peacock respectively).  There will be complaints and ratings will be flat/down slightly.

Brandel Chamblee will say something outrageous.  It will be forgotten within 72 hours.

Golf Channel will be talking about doing another reboot or possibly pushing the majority of its programming to Peacock by the end of 2021.

CBS and NBC will add another 1-2 minutes of commercials to their weekend coverage, angering viewers.  All because they overpaid for the PGA Tour rights package (bidding against who I have no idea) for reasons that make zero sense.

Expect the legacy golf magazines to trim another 1-2 issues per year off the print editions.  And yet, there will be at least 27 subscription forms in each copy.  Their equipment issues will have the kind of conflicts of interest that would never been allowed a decade ago.

Brick and mortar stores that thrive will figure out the secret sauce that makes them a better option than online.  This will start with better size options, and better service.  My plea to the stores: make the experience of shopping in your stores better than shopping online.  Please.  If I had a dollar for every time I’ve gone into a pro shop/store with money to spend and walk out because nothing they have in the store is my size, I could easily pay for a round anywhere except Pebble Beach and TPC Sawgrass.

2022 is going to be interesting because several NBC/Comcast rights deals (NHL, Premier League) come up for renewal (the NHL deal comes up after this season).  Could this open the floodgates for a consolidation of golf TV rights?  I know this seems insane, but if I told you that Fox was going to walk away from its USGA package in 2020, would you have thought I was crazy 12 months ago?

LOCAL NEWS

Rounds played in the DMV will take a slight hit when the cicadas make their once-every-17-years appearance this spring.  You’ve been warned.  Last time was in 2004 (courses without a lot of trees won’t have any issues).  The largest factor in the area will remain the weather.  If it’s favorable (we have normal rainfall, spring starts when it’s supposed to and it’s not surface of the sun hot for two months straight), then people will show up.  This area is still underserved with respect to public courses.

More of a wish, but Columbia Association will decide that they’ve done enough to screw up golf courses (they’re treading dangerously into Everything They Touch Dies territory) and turn over management of both Hobbits Glen and Fairway Hills to one of the big boys of course management (Troon, Kemper Sports, Billy Casper, ClubCorp, hell at this point might as well enlist Club Pro Guy and his fine superintendent Miguel Vega).  If anyone at CA is reading this, you have zero clue how to run a golf course and the people who actually work at your courses know this better than I do.   Actually, Columbia Association can’t really run a literal one-car parade.  They screwed up their gyms, they tried suing to prevent the annual Festival of Lights at Merriweather, and they’re doing their dead level best to continue to piss people off.

No local courses are going to close in 2021.  There was enough of a cull in 2018-2019 (and there definitely was one) and 2020 ended up being pretty good in terms of rounds played (once courses opened).   For now, all eyes are on DC as we watch to see what happens with the DC courses being redone by The Links Trust (Tom Doak and Gil Hanse working together) and eventually being managed by Troon.

Expect a hurricane, record rainfall, record heat and several other acts of God from August 23-29.  The BMW Championship is at Baltimore’s Caves Valley.  You think I’m kidding.  Not even a bit.  I’m old enough to remember the TUESDAY FINISH in 2006 at the then-FBR Open at what is now TPC Potomac.  I really hope I’m wrong on this, but history doesn’t exactly bode well.

I will play when I can, and probably maintain the kind of mediocrity that I’m famous for.  But I play fast, so there’s that.

Best wishes for a Happy New Year, and let’s all hope that in 12 months we’re remembering 2021 for the good things.

SONG OF THE DAY

This is more than 35 years old and it’s still good.  From the OG’s of Goth:

I Fixed Golf Channel. You’re Welcome

December 19, 2020 / / 0 Comments

Hey Everybody! It’s New and Improved!

With the news that Golf Channel has closed their Orlando studios and relocated in Stamford, CT (just outside of New York) along with the rest of NBC’s sports programming, it’s time to take a deep dive on how to keep Golf Channel relevant in 2021 and beyond.  I had extended family call Stamford home (they’ve since passed), and by all accounts it’s a lovely town (haven’t been back in several years).

As with most things, it took a notepad, two bourbons, and an open mind.  These changes don’t require significant investment, and will provide greater depth of coverage.

Bringing Shane Bacon on board to host ‘Golf Today’ (replacing ‘Morning Drive’) is a great first step that has been universally praised (and rightly so).  Shane was easily the best part of FOX’s USGA coverage.  It helps that nearly everyone who’s met him has said he’s a great guy.  He will also be on-site at major events as part of their ‘Life From’ coverage.

However, there are additional changes that are needed.  These changes are about adapting and trying to stay ahead of the curve.  The goal should be to continue to engage the core audience but also grow their viewership.  These changes reflect what I think is an expansion on Arnold Palmer’s vision for the network, while embracing the future of television.

  1. Addition of a rules expert at all PGA/LPGA Tour event coverage.  Not just during the majors but every week; the rules person can work out of their studios in Stamford.  Think how FOX and CBS each have a rules expert for their NFL and college football coverage who works from their studio.   While they’re at it, rules officials at tournaments should be wearing wireless mics so that viewers can easily hear what’s being said.  Nothing on this side of the Atlantic will match the master of what this can look like (seriously, Nigel is a cult figure); Slugger White wishes he were Nigel Owens.
  2. Addition of a weekly program devoted to NCAA golf coverage.  If they’re going to be serious about showing the NCAA championships and a few random tournaments, start here.   A weekly 60-minute show that has tournament highlight clips, previews of upcoming events and rankings isn’t a huge ask.  This can and should help them naturally build to their NCAA tournament coverage in April and May (you already have dedicated networks for the SEC, Big Ten, ACC and PAC-12 so it’s just down to assembling clips).
  3. CNBC has to become their default ‘overflow’ option on weekends (I get not wanting to use it during the week when the financial markets are open).  I like ‘Shark Tank’ and ‘Undercover Boss’ reruns and I’m sure others do as well, but there’s no reason to not use CNBC as the ‘overflow’ option.  It has good market penetration and won’t be a hard-to-find channel for viewers.
  4. Peacock (premium) should be used for next-generation stuff and/or alternate feeds.  If you want to try something new or out of the box, use Peacock for it (and go commercial free).  I’ve seen other platforms have a ‘fan commentary’ option (one example- having a European fan and a US fan doing commentary during the Ryder Cup).   In short, Peacock becomes their lab, which will enhance its value as a “plus” option.
  5. Make movie night great again.  Film interviews with the crews who did ‘Caddyshack’, ‘Bagger Vance’, ‘Greatest Game’, ‘Tin Cup’, etc.  And while you’re at it, obtain the rights for ‘Dead Solid Perfect’ (you can blur out the nude scene,- just don’t blur out the ice bucket…if you know, you know).  Even better- show the films uncut after hours.  Fine; you don’t want the kids to hear the swears or see partial nudity at 8:00 p.m., but overnight go wild (BTW, this doesn’t fall under FCC ‘decency’ standards laws because it’s cable).  ESPN Classic (when it existed) did this (talk to the filmmakers) for a ton of sports films.  MLB Network and NHL Network have done this for a few baseball and hockey films.  Go back and insert blurbs on these screenings (“this clip was filmed at Shady Pines CC in June 1981” or “this clip was shot after filming because Craig Stadler stained his pants and there wasn’t backup wardrobe”).
  6. Behind The Scenes at the Ryder Cup.  I’ve seen these ‘warts and all’ documentaries done, and when they’re done well they’re fantastic.  The Netflix series “Sunderland ‘Til I Die’, the HBO “24/7 Winter Classic (the first year especially when it was the Penguins-Capitals), the HBO “Hard Knocks” and the rugby union Lions Tour behind the scenes documentaries (on YouTube) are great stuff.  NBC/Golf Channel should insist on doing one.  Bring viewers into the team rooms, into the conference rooms where the team selection is debated, and follow players, captains and assistant captains around.
  7. Movies, Part II.  Run a contest for the next great golf film similar to HBO’s ‘Project Greenlight’.  Allow submissions, and pick one to option out for production.
  8. In addition to the “Inside The PGA Tour” weekly program, now that the PGA and LPGA Tours have a relationship, there should be an “Inside The LPGA Tour” program as well that gets aired and syndicated.  I’d bet Mike Whan would agree to this in about two seconds.
  9. More of a PGA/LPGA Tour issue, but they need to get the collective stick out of their butts when it comes to users posting clips on social media.  I understand ‘but muh broadcast rights’ but allowing a user to post 2-3 clips of 60-90 seconds per day on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/TikTok should be embraced.  If the Tours want to require their social media accounts are shared along with the video, then great (better social media engagement!).  But that clip of Bryson Dechambeau having a meltdown back in the summer was spectacular.  Like it or not this is how many people ‘consume’ content.
  10.  Find someone who can do long-form interviews.  I like David Feherty, but his act has gotten stale (not just his interviews).  The person who might be best suited is now at ESPN (Scott Van Pelt), so this may be one of those ‘develop someone internally’ deals.
  11. Nine-hole versions of ‘Shell’s Wonderful World of Golf’ with two-player mixed teams.  Three holes alternate shot, three holes shamble, three holes two-person best ball.  Something that can be consolidated into a 60-minute show.  Nine holes to cut down on time commitments and allow them to film content easier.
  12. In the spirit of ESPN8 (“the ocho”) have 1-2 days a year devoted to infomercials or their older programming (Kessler’s old interviews for starters).  They brought back old episodes of ‘The Big Break’ during the shutdown; go deeper and older.  Embrace history, but continue to look to the future.

Never stop innovating.  I know 2020 was rough on people for a host of reasons, but if you’re reading this, I sincerely hope you and your family have a wonderful holiday/festive season.  I think we’re all hoping 2021 is better for everyone.  All the best.

SONG OF THE DAY

 

 

Adieu, FOX. It’s About Time

June 29, 2020 / / 0 Comments

Not Coming To a Golf Tournament Near You

Late Sunday night the Associated Press reported that Fox was walking away from it’s 12 year USGA rights deal starting this year, with NBC/Golf Channel picking up the rights.  For viewers, this means that the US Open (which Fox was already advertising for this year’s event that was moved to September) will be on NBC.  It’s not clear who will pick up early-round coverage for Thursday and Fridays; Golf Channel would make a ton of sense, but they also have NBCSN as a viable alternative.

The USGA’s press release spells out the details.  Sort of.  Doesn’t really indicate how many hours will be on Golf Channel or NBC, but we digress.

I’ve been critical of Fox for a host of reasons.  I’m old enough to remember when they won US free-to-air rights for the NHL back in the mid 1990’s and gave viewers…glow pucks and animated characters.  I kid you not.  Who thought any of this made sense?

You “could” make the argument that the Fox Glowing Puck was a precursor to the ProTracer/Top-Tracer technology that should be as common as watching in HD.  I won’t.  Because the puck is black, and it’s on a white ice surface.  Not hard to follow if you have eyes.  Just watch where the players go.  Easy.

I was very critical of their 2015 and 2016 US Open coverage and deservedly so because it was terrible.  I don’t blame Fox as much as I do the USGA, who (based on multiple articles) seemed to want to go to Fox when the previous rights deal expired in 2014.  The USGA wanted this.  They wanted a broadcaster who had never covered the sport to cover the country’s national championship as their first broadcast.  It wasn’t as if Fox was covering the PGA Tour (or even a pro tour of some kind).

They brought in Joe Buck, who had never called golf before and never really improved (as I’ve said, if were doing 8-10 tournaments a year covering the PGA and/or LPGA Tour maybe it works better, but when he sees these players one week a year it’s always going to be problematic).  Greg Norman was their first analyst (smart, knows the game but couldn’t translate that into being that 18th hole analyst).  They flooded the air with people who had never worked together before on one of the two biggest viewing tournaments of the year.  They were unwilling to cover the controversy over Dustin Johnson’s ball moving in 2016 despite pros going after the USGA on social media(and were unwilling to call out the USGA’s incompetence in course setup in 2015, 2016 and 2018).  These are all self-inflicted wounds.

Sidebar: Joe Buck did several cameos on the IFC show “Brockmire” and he was outstanding and came off as a guy you’d totally want to hang out with.  If he brought that persona to his baseball and football coverage it would help a ton.  He was funny and he was able to throw a few good barbs out there.  If you’re looking for a show to binge-watch you could do worse.  Hank Azaria is hilarious.

Not to beat a dead horse, but Oakmont 2016 and Shinnecock 2018 should have been easy, but the USGA’s motto of “hold my beer while we fix that problem that didn’t exist” came into play.

Having said that, they did bring about some real change on the production side:

  1. The continuous leaderboard bug on weekend coverage or at the very least Sundays should become a permanent staple.  CBS and NBC have to make this part of their coverage on a weekly basis.
  2. Pro Tracer technology.  At first I wasn’t sure about this, but it works and doesn’t detract from the coverage.  Unlike hockey it doesn’t clutter the screen.  It adds to it.
  3. Drones.  I remember watching Fox’s initial coverage of the 2014 Franklin Templeton Shootout and being excited about the use of drones.  Full credit to the lads at No Laying Up who use drones extremely well.  Again, it very much adds to the viewing experience.
  4. Uninterrupted coverage during the last hour.  The Masters has long been the gold standard because they don’t clog up the viewing experience with an enema of commercials.  It’s a clean broadcast free of junk which serves the viewer well.

“If” I were NBC, here’s some things I’d do that would demonstrate a real understanding of how to take the good things that Fox did, and improve upon them.  Time to teach an old dog some new tricks.

  1. Use Mike Tirico as your studio host, and bring back Johnny Miller in some kind of a role for the US Open only.  He’s done this for horse racing and occasionally for their NHL coverage.
  2. Pro Tracer needs to be on every hole all four rounds.  Period.
  3. Use NBCSN for an alternate feed during weekend late day coverage.  They did this at the 2014 Ryder Cup.  Don’t need announcers.  Just show golf.  Doesn’t sound like this is the plan according to Jeremy Schilling.  If Peacock were to take this on then it could be a nice “add on” option.
  4. Adapt and use a leaderboard bug during the final round and leave it.
  5. Drones should be part of their overall coverage.  Follow the Fox blueprint on their usage.  The question everyone at NBC/Golf Channel should be asking is “how do we improve our coverage?” and ask this every day.

The only potential issue that I can see (from 2021 onward) is their Stanley Cup Final coverage running into the golf (especially for any west coast events, like in 2021 and 2023) which means that the Saturday/Sunday are going to be tricky options (even if you go to an afternoon start you have overtime as a potential issue).  Especially next year (2021 at Torrey Pines) if the NHL starts late and runs past the early June finish that they’ve had in 2018 and 2019 (finishing before June 10th) and/or if the NHL adds teams to their playoffs.

Coming Soon to Peacock (hopefully not)!

Overall I think this is a good move but we won’t know until September when it’s US Open time.

 

 

 

 

The Second Annual SGIC Airing of the Grievances

December 23, 2019 / / 0 Comments

Screw cookies and milk. I prefer bourbon. And a dozen ProV1’s.

What a year 2019 has been in golf.  The top story depends on where you’re from.  If you’re in the US then Tiger winning the Masters probably tops it.  European audiences may think Shane Lowry winning The Open at Portrush is the bigger deal.  Asian audiences may look towards the LPGA Tour for their bigger story.  There’s much to celebrate.

Image

And yet, a year later and boy, do I have some problems with a lot of you people.  So sit down, pour yourself a drink, and get comfortable.  Don’t even think about taking me on in feats of strength.

Patrick Reed: The dunce cap in human form.  Blatantly cheats during a limited field tournament in the Bahamas and provides the kind of bullshit story that no partially sane person with eyes would believe.  Then goes to Australia for the Presidents Cup and doubles down.  His caddie ended up shoving/pushing a fan.  Once a cheater, always a cheater.  He did this crap in college and is replicating form.  There’s no more benefit of the doubt with this clown.  Have cameras on him during every hole of every round because there’s no way you can trust him.

Bryson Dechambeau: May you lose majors after rightly getting hit with stroke play penalties.  Speed the hell up.  2 1/2 minutes for an 8 foot putt?  You should be forced to eat that stupid Hogan flat cap after it’s been dunked in Donkey Sauce.  You and JB Holmes should be forced to play together and be permanently on the clock.

USGA: Hey, you managed to not screw up the course at Pebble Beach.  Hooray!  Granted, overcast skies and cool temps with light wind helped.  Maybe take a trip to the Open Championship to see what they do.  No trickery, and no obsession over protecting a score.  Set up the course to be tough but fair, and what happens, happens.   Gary Woodland was fantastic tee to green at Pebble Beach and earned the win.  Winged Foot is similar; the less you do, the better.  Don’t overthink it.

European Tour: With Ireland picked to host the 2026 Ryder Cup the next one should go to the Old Course.  They last hosted in 1969.  This is a no-brainer.  Everyone knows the course.  17 and 18 are as great as it gets for match play.  DO IT.

R&A: You did a good thing by taking the Open to Portrush.  A rota of the Old Course, Royal Liverpool, Royal Troon, Royal St. Georges, Portrush, Carnoustie, and Muirfield (Lytham and Royal County Down as ‘secondary’ options) should do just fine.  Prestwick, Sunningdale can be added for the women’s rota.

PGA Tour: Can we talk about marijuana?  Please?  It’s time to take marijuana off the banned substance list.  Guys are using CBD, and as a former pot smoker, it’s not a stimulant.  As I’ve said before, I smoked it to help relieve stress at night so I could sleep better.  It’s legal in several states and this is all going in one direction.  Join the 21st century.

PGA Tour Rules Officials: Can we stop with the ‘won’t someone think of the children’ as an excuse to not enforce the rules?  So we give player X the benefit of the doubt who then knocks Y and Z out of the top 125 and back to the Korn Ferry Tour?  Either enforce the rules as they’re written or find people who will.  Looking at you, Slugger.

CBS: Just put Frank Nobilo into the 18th hole chair next to Nantz.  Please.  I’d take Nobilo 8 days a week over Azinger.

FOX: Just admit you’re not very good at this and move on.  You’re the drunk guy at a bar who’s pissed his pants, can’t stand up and still thinks he’s good to drive home.

NBC/Golf Channel: Quit screwing around with your LPGA coverage.  Live coverage on weekends is the absolute minimum, and this gong-show you keep doing with their Tour Championship is asinine.  On weekends, CNBC should become Golf Channel Plus (I don’t think people will mind losing a seventh rerun of some episode of Shark Tank).  You’re welcome.

NBC/Golf Channel: What part of “show live golf” is beyond you?  The Presidents Cup coverage was worse than terrible.  Showing people standing around looking at yardage books during the “playing through” bit doesn’t cut it.

New Media: There are outfits who do a great job (none of these folks I have any kind of relationship).  Looking at you, No Laying Up, Shane Bacon, Stephanie Wei and several other well-run blogs and websites that produce some truly great stuff.  Quality content is quality content.  Don’t steal content or fail to provide attribution and then get whiny when you get called on it.  You know who you are.  Also- you aren’t the story (and if you don’t get this, then get out NOW).  So don’t make yourself the story.

Time Rosaforte: Happy retirement but you’re leaving a giant hole in coverage.  One of the true “good eggs” out there who was always worth tuning in for.  You’ll be missed.  Dammit.  Rosaforte and Nobilo leaving at the same time is…not good (I’ve been a fan of Nobilo for some time).

University of Maryland: Quit screwing with the golf course.  Leave it the hell alone.  It’s a true hidden gem and a great test of golf.  Plus it’s open green space.  You can’t just pave everything over.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Festivus, Happy Winter Celebration.  Enjoy some great holiday music.  Miss you always Kirsty.

 

Labor Day and Something’s Missing

September 3, 2019 / / 0 Comments

From the 2nd tee at Rattlewood. I make a long shadow at sunup. Can’t really explain that it looks like my arms are out. They’re not.

Hope you’re enjoying your Labor/Labour Day.  After running a bunch of errands I had something of a brain cramp because I was convinced that today was the final round of a Playoff event, but thanks to the Tour’s new schedule, your only option is the final round of the Korn Ferry Tour Championship (which I’d like to see get elevated to NBC for the final two rounds).  The Champions and LPGA Tours wrapped up on Sunday as did the European Tour.

9th hole at Rattlewood. All about getting your second shot close unless you’re a REAL bomber and can hit a draw that stops on an elevated green that slopes hard from right to left.

Not to beat a dead horse but there’s no reason for the PGA Tour to avoid Labo(u)r Day weekend, but we digress.  I’m not the first one to suggest this, but a West Coast Tour Championship (whispers softly…use Riviera on a mini-rota with Olympic Club, LACC and maybe Chambers Bay) in prime time over Labor Day weekend gets you eyeballs you’re otherwise not getting.

No golf next weekend as I’ve got commitments both days but I plan on playing the following two weeks before heading on vacation.  Plus, I’ll admit to being a bit gun-shy about potential impact from Hurricane Dorian (all the best to everyone in Florida, Georgia and the Carolinas).

I played Saturday at Rattlewood fearful of rust from not having played in two weeks; no issues.  Got off to a good start and had as good of day with my irons as I’ve had in some time, with 11 GIR.  Didn’t convert much (1 birdie and 35 putts), but a 78 is never bad.  Had a bit of a blow-up on 18 where I had to make a 15 foot putt to save bogey, but overall a good round.

12th hole at Rattlewood. Just over 225 from the blue tee; playing 230+. Hit a 3 wood to 18 feet, putt to tap-in distance for a very satisfying par on a hole that’s closer to a par 3 1/2.

Less than four weeks before I head to the desert on vacation for the first time in two years.  Looking forward to it.

SONG OF THE DAY

 

The LPGA in the DMV Makes Perfect Sense (an open letter to Mike Whan)

July 24, 2018 / / 0 Comments

Your faithful scribe, hard at work.

Dear Mike,

First off, let me congratulate you on the work you’ve done in your time as LPGA Commissioner.  I’d argue that the LPGA is the most watchable professional golf circuit, and the closest thing to a true global circuit.  Leader-boards often look like a UN meeting is breaking out.  It’s good for the global game, and good for the sport.  The women who make up the Tour are fantastic ambassadors for sport and their game.

As you’re probably aware, your cohort (Jay Monahan) at the PGA Tour announced their 2018-19 wraparound schedule, which puts an end to the DMV (District of Columbia, Maryland, northern Virginia) hosting a professional golf tournament in 2019.  We’re all fully aware you have an event in Williamsburg, but that’s not really an option for most people in the area.  So let’s talk about the market.  When you combine the DC and Baltimore markets, they add up to 3.6 million households (2.5 million in DC and the Virginia suburbs, another 1.1 million from Baltimore and surrounding areas).  If you combine them, that’s the third largest US television market (they kick Chicago out from the 3rd spot), and they have zip to look forward to in terms of professional golf next year.

I should also mention that when you look at the richest counties in the country based on a 2016 survey, the DC area has the top three spots.  Loudoun and Fairfax Counties in Virginia, Howard County in Maryland.  Overall, the area is home to 10 of the top 25 counties based on median household income.  We play golf pretty much year-round unless the courses are closed.  If it’s above freezing and the courses aren’t snow-covered, people will play.  Same for the swamp-like summers.  I mean, what’s a little heat stroke among friends, right?

Did I mention we like sports?  Washington is a true 4-sport city, and not sure you noticed, but the Capitals won the Stanley Cup this past June.  The entire area joined the players on a multi-day bender afterwards.  We also have several colleges including a service academy nearby in Annapolis.  The Nationals just hosted the All Star Game.  The Wizards are a playoff team.  There’s an NFL team that plays in Landover…yeah never mind (the Ravens in Baltimore have won a Super Bowl this decade).  This area has supported the PGA Tour stop in the face of every possible obstacle including every possible weather event short of snow (that’s this area’s Achilles heel and we know it).  People showed up in the aftermath of a derecho that caused massive problems including volunteers.  Admit it- you’re looking up what a derecho is.  We all learned about this 5 years ago.  We didn’t show up the day after because the Tour didn’t let fans on the course because of safety concerns.  If they had, we’d have shown up.

The point is this- this area loves golf and has a proven record of supporting tournaments in spite of barriers put in front of us.  You should be putting the DMV on your tournament calendar.  Okay, you get the area is lucrative.  But let’s talk where to play; and it’s an impressive list.

Are there decent golf courses that can stage an event?  You bet your ass!  In Virginia, RTJ has hosted the Quicken Loans open and hosted multiple President Cup matches.  Laurel Hill is a public course that hosted a USGA Championship.  Creighton Farms should also merit a look if it has the space for the infrastructure a tournament needs.

Maryland has Bulle Rock (it hosted the LPGA Championship for several years in the 2000’s).  It’s still a tough test.  Closer to DC, you also have options.  Congressional’s list of tournaments and championships is as solid as it gets but their members are an odd lot.  Nearby, TPC Potomac just hosted the men in 2017 and 2018.  The golf course at the University of Maryland hosted a Web.com event for a couple years after a 2008 renovation.  Any dates after school lets out would probably work.  Worthington Manor has hosted US Open qualifiers and is a public course.  Baltimore CC (Five Farms) hosted the inaugural LPGA Crown event and remains one of those classic courses that could host an event on short notice.

Or, if you really want to swing for the fences, let’s talk about the District of Columbia.  Specifically, Rock Creek Park.  Sure, it’s not long or tough enough to challenge professionals.  But think about what might happen if you went into partnership (think the USGA with Bethpage Black)?  At the very least, take a look at it.  Admit it- you’re intrigued because you think big.

Weather-wise, July and August aren’t the best (admittedly it gets hot and humid not to mention thunder storms) but then again- your tour hits south Asia which makes DC heat/humidity look refreshing by comparison.  I know September and October are tough because you’re up against football and I know Portland has the Labor Day slot (and admittedly that’s a beautiful city).  But you could make it work.  May, on the other hand…that’s some fine weather.  Starting to warm up but not yet getting killed with the humidity.

The point is this: Putting a tournament in DC right before/after the Williamsburg event is easy travel for your players, and normally May is pretty nice here as I already noted.  So let’s do this.  It’ll be great.

 

 

The Crossover of Crossovers- Stanley Cup Playoff Games on Golf Channel (a helpful explainer)

April 9, 2018 / / 0 Comments

2003 Masters Champion Mike Weir dropping the puck at a Leafs-Flyers playoff game in 2003. This really happened.

Lost amid Patrick Reed winning The Masters on Sunday night (along with the coveted Green Jacket, $1.98 million in prize money, and the chance to have the 2019 Champions Dinner catered by McDonalds, Hardees and Domino’s) was the conclusion of the NHL regular season and the announcement of first round playoff dates/times and TV (Boston had a makeup game with Florida that finalized the pairings; otherwise the regular season was supposed to have ended on Saturday the 7th).

NBC, unlike the other network that shows golf (CBS), has managed to intertwine its afternoon NHL coverage successfully; the Sunday afternoon regular season games end on time and they’re able to transition over to golf coverage with minimal delay (unlike CBS’ college basketball coverage during the PGA Tour West Coast swing which ran late every single weekend).  Let’s just pretend that their 2007 decision to dump out of a Conference Final playoff game to show a horse racing pregame show never happened.  I point this out because if you take a look at the NHL schedule for the first round, you notice that two games are slated to air on Golf Channel (both games on April 18; New Jersey/Tampa followed by Anaheim/San Jose).  This is real; it’s not some delayed April Fool’s Day joke.

I suppose it’s similar to how NCAA basketball fans feel when they have to look for TruTV.

NHL fans have gotten used to NBC putting games on USA Network and CNBC in the first/second round, but Golf Channel’s deployment is a new thing.  While there are many hockey fans who watch golf (and vice versa), many people many not know what (or why, for that matter) Golf Channel is and why it exists.  It went on the air in January of 1995, founded by the late Arnold Palmer (sort of like if Gordie Howe started the NHL Network).  It was acquired by NBC/Comcast several years ago.  Golf Channel has never deviated from showing golf (other than endless airings of either Caddyshack, Happy Gilmore, Bagger Vance, The Greatest Game Ever Played, Bobby Jones/Strokes of Genius or The Squeeze).

While there are many differences between the PGA, LPGA, Champions (Senior), European Tours and the NHL, there are some similarities.  So in the interest of helping fellow hockey fans who may be curious about Golf Channel and the similarities between golf and hockey, I humbly offer an a primer.  You’re welcome.

Point of Contention Hockey Golf
Annoying old man who spends too much time hanging around much to the annoyance of most people who wish he’d do it less Don Cherry Donald Trump
Movie that fans can quote pretty much verbatim that made a horrible sequel nobody wants to acknowledge Slap Shot Caddyshack
Movie with dozens of inaccuracies people love to hate Youngblood Happy Gilmore
Annoying guy with a checkered past named Patrick Patrick Kane Patrick Reed
Beloved player who can’t win the country’s most important event and has failed repeatedly on a grand and tragic scale Alex Ovechkin Phil Mickelson
Studio Analyst that drives most fans off the wall Mike Milbury Brandel Chamblee
Rules Concept that exists that nobody understands Goaltender Interference Anchoring the putter
Rule that will immediately start an argument Getting Rid of Fighting Rolling the Ball Back
Annoying Analytics that a lot of fans wish people would shut up about Corsi/Fenwick/PDO Strokes Gained
Crossover figure who plays the other sport very well NHL Official Garret Rank Mike Weir, Graham DaLaet
Lightning Rod Game Analyst “shut up about it” go-to phrase Pierre McGuire “When I was an assistant coach with the Pittsburgh Penguins…” Johnny Miller “In 1973 at Oakmont when I shot my 63”
Phrase you hear that makes you want to stab your eyes out “Respect the Game” “Protect the Field”
Annoying Team Competition that really brings out the worst in fans Olympics Ryder Cup
Catch phrase from a main announcer you hate “WAFFLEBOARD!” “Hello Friends”
Played-out rivalry no serious fan cares about Ovechkin/Crosby Tiger/Phil
Potential International Rivalry Connor McDavid/Auston Matthews Patrick Reed/Rory McIlroy
Annoying Fan Behavior #1 Lower Bowl fan on cell phone waving at camera BABA BOOEY, DILLY DILLY, MASHED POTATOES.
Annoying Fan Behavior #2 Throwing things on the ice Calling to report a rules violation
Beloved analyst with crossover appeal Bob McKenzie David Feherty
Schtick you want to see fired into the sun Multiple outdoor games in a season Big Break
Variation from the game that inspires passions on both sides 3 on 3, 4 on 4 Match play, 2-man team golf
Hated figure running the game Gary Bettman The USGA
Best Trophy Stanley Cup Claret Jug
Amateur jerk move Beer league player with a tinted visor 20-handicapper with a pro staff bag
Asshole amateur tactic Ringers Sandbaggers

 

The Oscar For Greatest Golf Infomercial Is Right Here

March 14, 2018 / / 0 Comments

As you know, I love infomercials.  Golf infomercials are even better.  I thought I had seen true excellence.  While the Golflogix GPS, Perfect Club, and the Brandel Chamblee Quiet Feet ones were all very good, they have been one-upped.  It takes a special kind of spectacle to outperform the Perfect Club, but folks, we have a winner here.

First off, I have to thank Ryan David at RD Golf Media for bringing this to my attention.  You can never predict when you’re going to see greatness.  Tiger Woods at the 1997 Masters.  Auston Matthews scoring 4 goals in his NHL Debut in 2016.  Korean barbecue at 2:00 a.m.  The first time my lips were met with the golden nectar of the gods that is single malt Scotch Whisky.  And now, for your consideration, I give you Royal Lifestyle Golf Clubs.

Let’s watch this together, shall we?

0:02: White pants, un-tucked red shirt.  Okay, I’m in.  The pseudo-British accent at Peter Alliss depth tells you it’s working.  And it’s classy.  It’s the new ‘it’s made in Germany- they make great stuff’ line.

0:08: He goes full Men In Blazers ‘The Tingling’ with a ‘WOW!’  It ‘almost’ makes you want to touch your own nipples. Almost.

I get it. It makes me want to touch my nipples too, Rog.

0:16: Note to the ‘Elvis is Still Alive’ folks.  All is forgiven. Mine eyes have seen the light. If that gold medallion could talk, oh the stories it would tell.

0:24: Powered by the Japanese Pachinko Ball!  It’s a metal ball!  But Japanese!  Magic!  Outta my way, I must have All Of The Pachinko Balls!

0:31: If you’re saying to yourself “umm, the production values are really something” we’re just getting started.  That weave on his head is spectacular, and it’s real muskrat.  Maybe.

0:40: The Royal Lifestyle, and we manufacture The Jumano Line.  Made by Vandalay Industries!

1:04: Hey, this guy’s an engineer by trade!  He should mention that again.  Is it me, or has this guy had a few pops?

1:17: Powered by the Japanese Pachinko Ball!  More oomph!

1:27: It took him 3 years to design this wonderful set of clubs.  Noted.

1:50: I’m an engineer!  Oh, and if someone tells you they’re “probably close to a 0 handicap” you know that you’re on Bullshit Mountain.

2:08: I can think of a few other things that exceed your imagination. But go on…

2:31: “It’s all a bunch of stuff” isn’t the argument we need, but it’s what we deserve and what we’re getting here. If Taylormade or Titleist put out a new line of clubs and said “The Taylormade M10…it’s all a bunch of stuff!” I’d totally buy it.  I’d walk in, take out my wallet and say ‘Gimme that M10 and just take my money’ and I’d have company.

2:34: Brain-warshing?  Oh shit, we’re going full Golf Chemtrails here!

2:44: Reminder…he’s an engineer.  Do you think he likes trains in an unhealthy way?  Just asking.

3:11: Seriously, the production values and the awkward zooming in are straight-up Public Access TV greatness.

3:44: This rationale is some next-level bullshit, but man he’s owning it.

4:00: This guy made engineering calculations, and he went through computers.  Can we stop for a minute and try to imagine the glory and majesty that this guy’s Facebook profile must look like?

4:15: He went in China.  His words.  I can’t even…which apparently, is comprised of boats on rivers.

4:32: Clubheads and shafts are two different things, but really, that’s what they WANT you to believe.

4:40: I was there four…three…hours a day for four hours at a time.  Yup, this totally sounds believable.  Standing there…sitting there…watching.  Would you like to see pictures of his girlfriend from Canada?

5:22: Describing computer testing…my god.  He’s really going all in on this ‘large head is bad’ thing.  So by transitive properties, giving pros tiny heads would…increase distance?  That’s why all the manufacturers keep making smaller heads for the pros.  Got it.

5:50: More Oscar-caliber camera work.  Is the 14-year old that’s doing this on meth or something?  His ‘there’s no spring action’ comments, it must be noted, are pure malarkey.  But keep going.

6:35: I’m not saying he’s making it up as he goes along, I’m saying he’s TOTALLY making it up.  He’s going all in on this. I mean, he’s completely full of it, but he’s committing to the bit.

6:40: What exactly does hitting it with the same integrity mean?

6:57: 110 mph of clubhead speed is approaching tour level.  Just saying.

7:02: Pachinko Ball!!!  More Power! More oomph!

7:08: More Oscar-level editing.  Hot.  Hot I tells ya!

7:38: No sir, YOU are a gift from the gods.  Your entire essence.  Keep going!

7:55: I don’t know who exactly he’s talking to, but can I take ‘Voices in His Head’ for $1000?

8:59: Hermongous?  WTF is that?  Are the drugs wearing off?

9:45: Whack!  Wait…earlier he said you can’t compress the ball, now you can?  I’m confused.

10:04: I’m an engineer and probably a 1, 2 handicap.  Well which one is it?  My handicap card doesn’t say “I’m about a..” it has my index.  An exact number.

10:24: They want to hit it farther and don’t care how straight it is?  Put. The. Crack. Pipe. Down.

10:55: More talk about how a small head is okay.  Compensating much?

11:12: Pachinko Ball!  More oomph!

11:18: Finally, how can I order this flaming pile of crap?  A number AND a website?  Whee I’m hot today!

11:25: The driver is filled with foam and cork?  Sweet holy mother…someone better alert Club Pro Guy!  He’d totally dominate that Mexico mini-Tour!

11:30: Oomph!  Give me all of the oomph!  Someone appears to have dyed their hair a bit darker.

11:38: Two things.  One, he casually drops that he’s making a movie.  Yes, and it’s spectacular.  And two, his other driver is called ‘The Wow Effect’ which is so terrible it’s great.

11:52: TURN AWAY. NOW.  MAKE IT STOP, MAKE IT STOP.

12:07: Our host John Jumano has put on the Al Czervik suit.  Baby blue…oh yeah.  Now it’s a sub-commercial for car dealers.  Yeah, give me that 1988 Yugo but you better include those clubs!  The wedges have dots and grooves and I’m pretty sure the putter is an Ol’ Billy Baroo.  I mean, are you gonna trust some guy like Bob Vokey or the marketing machine that is John Jumano?

12:50: More top-notch editing and fading.

12:55: And now, back to old men who own sports cars.  Foam filled cork.  Just let it wash over you.

14:00: “I love you baby” and yes, he kisses it.  12/10 level creepy.

14:31: A movie he’s producing, it’s called Titanic Johnson.

The man has his own cologne. Don Draper couldn’t have done better.  Stare at it…let it wash over you.

Oh, but wait, there’s more.  Yes, there’s a movie trailer.  If you don’t watch the entire 7 minutes of brilliance you are missing out.

You’re welcome.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When You Are The Slow Play Problem

February 1, 2018 / / 0 Comments

Last weekend’s Farmers Insurance Open should have been remembered for Tiger Woods returning to competitive golf and posting a better-than-expected finish in the top 30 and Jason Day winning in a 6-hole playoff that finished on Monday due to darkness on Sunday night.  Unfortunately, what most die-hard types are talking about are the beyond-ridiculous four minutes and ten seconds it took for JB Holmes to play his second shot on 18 on Sunday.

You read this correctly; it took JB four minutes and ten seconds to play one shot.  For the record, if someone I got stuck playing with pulled this, they’re getting left behind.

Golf already has a litany of issues; adding a televised slow play meltdown at a time when CBS was cutting into their coverage of the Grammy Awards was at best terrible.  When Jim Nantz calls you out on live TV (he might have had an early dinner reservation for all I know, but still) for slow play, there’s a problem never mind all the people who wanted to watch the Grammy Awards getting pissed His fellow tour pros called him out on Twitter (calling him in his face en masse afterwards would have been preferable).  The final threesome took six hours to finish and finished more than a hole and a half behind the group in front of them (at most public courses you’d have the marshal/player assistant/golf police drop the hammer).  People wonder why slow play is a problem; it’s because people see this on TV and when they go to their local course they do the same crap (glacial pace of play, taking forever to read a green when putting, etc.).

Making matters worse, Holmes responded with something along the lines of not knowing he had a homework assignment due.  He didn’t know how long he was taking was his actual excuse, which is some straight up bad etiquette.  Again, pull this at any public course and the other people in your group and the marshal/ranger is going to light you up (and they should).

The solution is simple; the rules say it’s 40 seconds to pull a club and complete your shot.  Two warnings, then a stroke penalty.  Anything longer than 60 seconds is an automatic stroke penalty.  Three stroke penalties in a tournament and it’s an automatic DQ.  Two DQ’s in a season and you’re ineligible for the FedEx Cup Playoffs.  Three and you lose your card and are ineligible for sponsor exemptions.  Make Ready Golf mandatory for PGA Tour events.  I’d go so far as to set a daily time par based on the course, weather conditions, and how early/late the player goes out and make finishing outside a threshold of the time par a stroke penalty.  Until you start hitting players where it hurts (on their scorecard, making them ineligible for playoffs and losing their Tour card), you’ll see the same crap every week.

SONG OF THE DAY

NOW IS THE TIME ON SPROCKETS WHEN WE DANCE.

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